find my poems
in a hundred years
and analyze them
as though they are written
in a foreign language
from a foreign time
full of foreign ideas
and words

analyze the way i say
i'm sad

"the darkness outside
spills into my empty room
on a body
wracked with sorrow
but too proud to cry"

analyze the idea
that everything i write
means something else
and i am not just
too lazy for prose

interpret me needing to talk
as me creating allusions

say to my face that when i said

"i'm happy"

it was sarcastic irony that reflected
my inner turmoil

analyze my poem
that is free therapy
to mean something
i wrote just for you

it speaks to you because
my word choice
was simple
every day

it speaks to you because
my alliteration is
totally
on purpose

it speaks to you because
literary terms
speak to you
more than some words
that meant

"i'm sad"

analyze me
and look past my struggles
that don't fit your agenda

analyze me

i am poetry

my soul is poured out
in each of these lines
each letter is me

so analyze me
like one of your french girls

make me beautiful

make me something that is
not
desperate poetry

make me you

Why am I so desperate to be heard?
What is the panicked urgency within?
Why do I scratch my name into the earth,
Tree bark, picnic tables, paper,
In a frenzied bid to make the world understand?

I don't understand.

non

in french it means "no"

as a prefix
it negates everything after it

i live in a constant state
of feeling
"non"

my life is lead by non-interesting adventures
to non-exciting places
that make me feel more
non

in comparison to everyone
and even only to myself
i am
non-pretty

i smile my
non-white
smile

and nod my
non-even
head

i hang out
alone
with my
non-friends
who pretend
just like me
that we are not just
non

i am the prefix
non

name a nice adjective
and add a non

that is me

non-kind
non-nice
non-happy
non-beautiful
non-social
non-talk­ative
non-humble
non-talented
non-human
non-EVERYTHING

I AM TIRED OF BEING NON

I WANT TO BE SOMETHING

I WANT TO BE
PRETTY
AND NICE
AND KIND
AND TALKATIVE
AND SOCIABLE
AND GRATEFUL
AND HELPFUL
AND HAPPY

BUT ALL I AM

IS

non

If you love someone
That doesn't mean
You expect things in return
If you care, someone
It doesn't mean
Need a payback.

When you whisper the affection
The words are words you express
But the meaning is beyond the words
It remains deeply within

If you don't mean
What you utter softly
Then you don't cheat anybody
Other than yourself

Life you chose and abide
Shared everything
Thinking and inking which
A pen writing blood red

Love and living is balancing
One leaves the other off balance
Even though waiting alone
Difficult to keep the balance

The love is what you say
But that means you have passion
The trust you present in words
And you're entrusted

Kiss and hug is overt,
Trust and care is inert
No one's able to hurt
And you always live alert !

Lie to me
Tell me that you love me

At least this way I know you are
Telling the truth