In depth of sorrow
Drowned in tears
With shaky hands, leaking fear
A million voices in your head
Some are demons, some are friends
They catch you at your weakest
Hit you when your down
In the depths your mind, the back of your head
Within your heart
The flood of letters and strings of words
That of which the meaning escapes you
Just a strange piece
A useless writing
Telling of the odd thoughts in one's mind
When they're in depth
Consumed depression
Sickening sorrow
Ill fated mind
Living in an era
A world of their own
Beneath the drapes of sight
In the depths of their mind lay a world of their devising
Once upon a time

Taken aback
By the receding depths,
Gazing into the shimmering sea.
Wondering,
How far will i go,
Before i fall?

I turn my head to the most beautiful sight of all - the sapphire, green-brown, grey ocean.
(Breath In)

The thick blue ocean that rolls, churns, and glistens.
And the glisten slices, the glistening currents. The ripples that move the ripples that have no ending or beginning.
(Breathe Out)
_

Every shape, form, and structure captured in the liquid.
It smooths out.
It rounds out.
It rolls out, it crashes down.
It’s smooth clarity. It’s smoothness it beyond me.

Its beauty is truly found within its movement. It’s constant change, exchange between all forms;
Connections throughout,
Different experiences of the same object throughout,
And out and out.

I see this giant blue gulp, of sea of truly magnificent bodies of water held in a single space.

As I see the land overturn over:
In new shapes, colors, lengths, and everything that contrasts one thing to another

I just see so much brightness, dimness, and something that overturns into another.
,,,,
I can not believe this sea
How it makes that sound

And when nothing is around
It just profound,

How every jewel of the dancing ocean
is a collection of drops
connecting forms throughout
__
When I feel the truth of this beauty
I see,

the ocean, something I never created
It was there to touch us
To hold us
This ocean was made to believe in us.

Without realizing it I just fell into a deep sleep.
I fell into something so deep.
I felt the ocean's arms
embracing me

Do not tell me that i won’t always be alone. Stop telling me that, it's not true. Please stop giving me that idea, when i always end up by myself. And you’re surrounded by people who love you while i’m surrounded by people who use me- who i let use me because it makes me feel wanted, if even just for a second. Because i’m so alone otherwise that i feel ******* empty. Don't tell me, “Someone will stay.. eventually”, when you left me and let me drown after convincing me to take the leap of faith off my cliff into your vast dark waters. And even when i am so sure that i can swim, i am pulled back into your undertow, suffocating on the words that i wish i could scream in your face and choking on the love that continues to fill my chest, regardless of all the ******* that you put me through. Keep your rotted apologies that beat against me in meaningless waves, those comforting words that keep me afloat until your hands can latch on like a shark, and those ******* looks of pity as if i'm the mer-thing that was never supposed to get caught in your net of lies. But at least there is one lie that i will never believe: That there are plenty of fish in the sea and that i will find the one for me.

                       -**** the fish, you are my whole    
                                                       ­  ******* ocean
                        and i'm just trying to tread water

how they make you feel
has nothing to do with them
but it has everything to do
with how you feel about you