You are so like her it scares me.
That’s why I’m finding this so hard.

a kiss, long forgotten
turns back the time
déjà vu got your head spinning
to sweet love

a cheesecake
sliced and shared with care
graham ******* crumbles on the chin
wiped away as a melody rings clear
keys pressed softly, your hands covering mine
harmonizing----until a ******
crescendoing like a storm
Cover your eyes, my darling
it won’t hurt

but it did
seeing that same heat
radiate
from you and another
lover
her lipstick
staining your face--
red
as the cold flush on my cheeks

when i emptied the bucket of your love
once full to the brim
of your
empty promises

I dreamt that I saw you
barreling towards me in a sea of people,
and with your arm extended out
to touch me, pushing past me,
and you looked back
with bewildered eyes,
scared, confused,
but not knowing;
I only recognized you when I awoke,
and I'm sure
you'd never remember who I was.

a lovely place
of lovely memories
full of young future
and
furniture

Three years ago today, the moment he walked through the door, it wasn't deja vu, it was a memory of a fantasy I played out in my mind hundreds of times as a little girl, as a teenager, as a woman, finally catching up in real time - a fantasy of a man I would meet someday who would be all I could ever desire in a lover, friend, and husband.

Three years ago today, the moment he walked through the door, standing 6' 14", I recognized him immediately as the nameless, faceless man I imagined for years and I finally felt alive! authentic! electric!

Three years ago today, the moment he walked through the door, I fell irrevocably in love and I never want to put myself back together again.