Ink
blots
impossible
knots
testing the limits of
a circular drive
one hand on the wheel
the other copping a feel
of his passenger mate
dutifully nursing her neonate
foot goes down
to apply the break
fracturing fingers
is what it will take
to lessen
the voice
avoid
the slade
move
the mountain
tell me, don't floaters
eventually get flushed?

In a world where traits such as bigotry, greed, narcissism, non-empathy and some level of superiority (in ones own mind) are the key attributes to ensure success and some sense of purpose and fulfilment... I am less distressed than I should be to have failed at life.
I have come to appreciate simplicity and things that are genuine and wonder what reality looks like to the successful. Do they value a warm embrace and a soft kiss and the company of someone who likes them for who they are in the same way I do? And when (if) they feel and experience these things in a genuine way does their success still feel good when they reflect on what made them? Do they even reflect upon such things... or would they be less successful in their own minds if they saw themselves for who they are?
Can you be happy if your aspirations are something other than to love and be loved in return? Without these all is deception and you are both the deceived and the deceiver.

I told these stars about how we met

I approached you and crashed on you

And they shimmered even brighter

Then I told them about your beauty

Not about the membrane, but your soul

They beamed and huddled up the clouds

Thus, I started portraying our journey

From being strangers to soulmates

This time the winds started to waft smoothly

And I felt that romance anew

Which I was used to with you

Perhaps the winds found your remains in me

As the journey started again they too joined us

And felt the same what I had felt once

And the horizon changed its color to celebrate our love

Finally, I told them how I left you alone midway through life

In agony and tears to live my desolation daily, to which,

The stars dimmed, the winds slowed and clouds began to rain

After a time they made the sky clear

With many stars twinkling

Some very bright and a few dim

But the dimmest one was me

I love you.

No. Shut up.
You don’t get to love me.
You don’t get to drown me in the sea of your fabricated passion,
Nor do you get to drag me through the gravel of your emotional inventions.
I see through your facade;
Your desperation to keep me close,
The fear of losing me rendering you incapable of rationality.
You convince yourself of these feelings
Yet in the process of fooling me,
You deceive yourself.
You ensnare me in the waves of your fiction,
But clasp your soul onto the crown of an anchor.

Keep lying to yourself.
Soon enough you’ll find yourself at the bottom of the ocean.

when did I start deceiving myself and those around...

(wince)

...should scrape off this veneer of delusion with blades of veracity

Wake up.

Wait a moment after you open your eyes,thinking and wanting to just go back to bed.

Realize you can’t.

Sit up and look out the window. Contemplate jumping out.

Distract yourself and tell yourself you’ll jump tomorrow.

Get dressed, wander to the bathroom thoughtlessly, and do the same mundane tasks you do every morning.

Start to smile. Who knows,maybe you’ll fool yourself.

Repeat the next day.

Here I am,
Dancing with the devils
All of them,
So desperate, so desperate

Here I am,
Dancing with the devils
Letting them deceive me,
Because I want to see their true faces

Here I am,
Dancing with the devils
Looking into their eyes, into their homeless souls

Here I am,
Dancing with the devils
Looking into their eyes, into their homeless souls
They think they can make a home in Hell,
None of them know
Hell wasn’t built for them
Hell was built for refugees of Heaven
For freedom, to be away from the devils carrying out Heaven’s deeds.

Here I am,
Dancing with the devils
To take a good look at everything Heaven doesn’t want to show

With every scapegoat,
      I fed the grass of  perjury.

Then I'd be a distortion,
pealing the fragmented
              façade from me...

Walking away from the wreckage.

       Leaving them trapped
and broken in the remnants
                                         of my echo..

                                         Hi I'm Judy,
   I always like names with J..

No goats this time,
                                   just sheep ready
to follow me to the slaughter house..