The roofers are done with their day
So off they went on their way
But they left somethings behind
And wouldn't you know I'd find
When in the open box I took a look
And my hands they sure shook
I picked it up and put it down twice
**** my favorite vice
But I made a promise, so the Boxcutter had to stay
It was better that way
But I wrung my hands
The thoughts in my head where all crammed
As I paced back and forth
Like a tethered race horse
But your only as good as your word
Over all the other voices in my head was heard
My grandfather was a wise man
So like always on those words I'll stand
Done with my work day
I just walked away
I didn't make that awful slip
But my hands on the wheel had a tight grip
I wanted to do 80 but i could only do 65
Another promise that today would survive

Slice it up, make it quick
It'll be done with just one flick
Cut it deep
I want it to do more than weep
Cut out the bad
Oops that's all I had
rivers of blood from me pour
Now I'm in pieces on the floor
I just couldn't take it any more!!

Cutter cutter heres your lullaby
Take this knife and slice it away
Cutter cutter it won't be ok
Cutter cutter make me bleed
The voices in your head tell the truth
Cut away the pain its the only way
Cutter cutter you won't be ok
Cutter cutter go deeper
So many scars on her skin
They tell the story of her
Cutter cutter your scars tell you past
Cutter cutter how much longer
One day you might go to deep
Cutter cutter it'll get better
Cutter cutter cut no more

I'm a cutter can't you see the scars all in their lines
Can't you see the signs
It just means my life is less than bliss
And happiness is what I miss
I don't want your sympathy
It's more like let me be
I'm not gonna cover them
Much to your chagrin
If you don't want to see, don't look
But I won't dangle from your hook
I won't set upon your shelf like a book
I am who I am
Hope you understand

This pain in my heart keeps me company
The cigarettes cannot take it away
And even though I try to ask for help
No one ever sees it during the day

At night I draw to release the hurt
Drawing on my arms, my hips, my legs
Tonight I draw deeply
And maybe this will end this pain.

My mom can't figure out why all the knives are getting dull

She had never felt closer to numbness
Than when that razor was against her skin
She had never felt closer to happiness
Than when she was by his side
Once he took her razors away
She had to find something else to lean on
He whispered "pick me, I'll never let you fall"
She hesitated
But then she fell in love

He checked my wrists and thighs
He checked my stomach and my sides
He checked and said "Let me see if you've been cutting again"

He gave no warning.
No sign that he was going to do this in the last hour that I faced him.
He looked me up and down, eyes more serious than I've ever seen
I couldn't help but feel embarrassed that I let him down once before
I was embarrassed I relapsed and he was there to see me unravel.

"I've been good"
"I've been good"
"I've been good"
I felt like a child, repeating the sentence over and over
Our friends continuously asking what I meant and he simply says
"It's nothing."
But in his eyes I could see
To him it meant everything

So he checked
He checked my wrists and thighs
He checked my stomach and my sides
He hugged me tight and whispered softly
*"Please stay good, I love you to much to lose you like that."

blacked out
tears flow

          Pain in her heart
          thoughts racing
              
                       child screams
                       Mother weeps
                    
                                     Pain leaks
                                     blood falls.
                                                falls.
   ­                                             falls.

she snaps back
frozen in confusion

         cold with dread
         what just happened?

                            looking with sorrow
                            new tears begin to form.

she doesn't understand how
its been all these years.

        why would she now
        for something so small.

                          It all just built up
                          all that small ******* ****.

Until it tore her down.
                            down.
                         ­   down.