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“Why do you always distance  yourself when we get closer...like if you don't want to be friends just say it”
“Okay... I don't want to friends”
When I was 8:
I met this guy
He was nice and kind
He was short and shaped like a ball
He still made me fall
Deep in his eyes
I felt alive
After a while we stoped talking and I never saw him again

When I was 9 my best friends of all my life:
Left
With no regret in their eyes
Like they see something they despise
And all those night thinking I wasn't enough
Were very rough
Losing the only people you love is very tough

When I was 11 :
I understood that they were gone
And I moved on
Thats when I met him
The only one that could make me laugh
Like back then

When I was 12 :
He didn't like me anymore
Says he got bored

When I was 13:
I saw him again
The short was shaped like a ball
Except he wasn't like that at all
He got taller
Taller than my father
He got toned
And it showed
I felt a blush creep on my face
I said hey and he smiled

When I was sure there wasn't any love left:
I trusted her
I told her I liked him
She understood I could never walk up to him
So she did
She got his number
His hoodie
His love

When I gave up:
“Yeah he likes me a lot but I dont”
I then understood  that if you love someone
They will leave
So sorry
But I dont want to be your friend
Jay Aug 2019
They say she is ugly
She was just a girl
Her father neglected her
Her cousins abused her
Her friend ***** her
She was just a girl
She looked into the mirror
Why aren't I pretty?
She was bullied everywhere she went
She was too fat
Too dumb
Too ugly
Too this
Too that
So her best friend was some ****
And some coke
She was with **** for awhile
But she drowned herself with *** in her room
With the lights off
She was just a girl
She wanted to be loved
She started cutting
Almost died about a dozen times
Once a truck
Twice a noose
Three times she tried to drown
Four slitting her veins
Twice an overdose
No one cared though
She was just a girl
She was gay
Everywhere she went she was called a ***
She tried to date
But she messed up too many times
She just wanted attention
They were scared of her depression
They thought she was bad
But really...
She was just a girl
She was scared of the world
Her dad and cousins
******* her up
She stopped speaking
Stopped smiling
She lost friends
Lost hope
Lost love
this is about me, the old me that I killed, I am no longer that person, I don't even Identify as a girl anymore, but I am just as empty
Butterfly Aug 2019
I can't hold on any longer.
The words of the people i love cut deeper in my hart then my knife does. I tell myself every night that i can do this.
But all i tell meself are lies to keep me going. I see the truth in the lies that i tell.
And if you keep lying to yourself, you loose all the trust that wasn't even there.
This is a mess but that` bc i don`t have my grammer check on this laptop.
Growly Wolfus Jul 2019
I chuckle lightly and smile at my knife.  One day, I would use this weapon to take my own life.  Slowly, I jab it into my arm, dragging it down and causing self-harm.  I have an addiction to inflicting pain, so I do it to myself since nothing will I gain except for the scars and blood on my skin.  How could this ever be considered a sin?

The blood trickles slowly down, hardening then turning brown.  I clean it up as if nothing happened.  If my parents knew, they'd be deeply saddened.  I act like I do normally and my friends don't notice anything wrong with me.  I wear a jacket to cover the scratches.  Some are still healing from last week's matches.

I feel the need to try other ways to cut myself, but to my dismay, I lost my only blade.  I bought a better one for which I paid.  The cuts on my arms grow more crowded.  There are too many to be counted.

After slicing my arms, legs and feet, I look to Death who I'll soon greet.  Just one stroke to end my life.  I whisper a prayer and grab my knife.  Admiring the dagger-like shank, I slide it against my neck and calmly thank anyone who didn't know of this.  They are all oblivious.

Today I will complete my mission, a goal of which I am commissioned.  You must  know, this has to be, and now I'm dead because no one stopped me...
I drew a very eye-opening image on the back page in my notebook.  This poem accompanies it.
viola Jun 2019
Have you ever cut your hands
picking up
someone else's broken pieces?
shed blood
as they walk away
with the only band-aid.
Anastasia Jun 2019
she was thinking again
about the seams in her legs
the stitches
and weeping.
it terrified her
the blood gushing out
torn skin
the flavor of pain
her eyes were locked open
and she stared at the seams
tears pouring from her sewed-open eyes
she sits on her pile of ashes
her blood mixing
making a muddy paste
that crusts on her eyelashes
her bruised cuts growing on her flesh
opening
and reopening
maggots gnawing on her body
eating the remnants of flesh
and she stares.
don't follow them
With blade as her plume
Her blood as her ink
Her skin as her paper
She scribbled cuts
Instead of letters
She writes a mail
Of torment and misery
Across her wrist
To those person she loved truly
But it seems the mail
Will remain unsent
For she decides to hide
And alone she bled
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