The light shines through the windowpane
and I start to melt, I scream in pain
Hello? help, I can't do this again
Shut the curtain, I'm alone again
Sizzled and fried, I think I just died
How does it feel to still be alive?
My lungs are the only thing that's left
Slowly rising and falling in a ****** mess

How does it feel to still be alive?
Stop crying
Goodmourning

My heart skips beats when I can't sleep
My eyes strain red
I shot myself in the head
This hole in my brain makes me think I'm insane
Watch me laugh it off again
Syrup pours out but it's not very sweet
So I'll hand you the gun, tell you, "copy me."
Outcasts in hysteria hold onto our feet

How does it feel to still be alive?
How does it feel to join the dark side?
Stop crying
You're dying
Goodmourning

"i'm not going anywhere"
what a lie

she started realizing her worth
until she was set back again
she realized she drove everyone away
no one wants to deal with a broken little girl anyway

maybe she doesn't deserve anything
maybe she deserved the pain
after all she wasn't a perfect person
she's made a lot of mistakes

"maybe it's karma" she thought
she was spiraling more and more each day
she grew more angry with herself
and dark thoughts took over again

they creeped back into her mind, right when started doing well again
this time, the thoughts are more intense and strong
the temptation is there
but she knows she shouldn't give in

she wants to so badly though
she thinks she deserves to feel the pain
after all she drove everyone away
no one wants to deal with a broken girl anyway

daddy didn't love her did he
mommy didn't love her either did she
she was used to it though

seasons change and time went by
she realized she wasn't used to it
she realized her soul was rotting away

nobody likes to be caught in a storm
nobody wants to drown in the ocean
so they always left her before she ****** them in

a broken little girl wasn't she
a broken girl who would never be able to feel love
since everyone who realized she was broken left

Once, I wrote down all my happenings.

On an old paper

Invaded by a stranger

Myriads of night, crying


My friend has been exposed

Did you notice it was raining?
The day that we first met
I wonder if that was god crying
Because he knew what would happen next.

Like a diamond perfectly clear,
in your eye, I saw a forming tear.
In your beautiful sincere eyes,
hurt by so many lies,
you were told
and which
you had to unfold.
Now, as we speak,
a first tear rolled down your cheek.
I wiped it away,
but others made their way,
down your face.
I gave you the warm embrace,
you needed so much
and tried to calm you with my touch.
Soon you pushed away your pride,
and I just held you while you cried.
You let all your pain out
until you were completely drought.
You were ready to be happy once more,
and that’s what I was hoping for.
You can now start without any fears,
even though my shirt’s wet from your tears.

Why am I so stuck on you?
Because you fit all my standards
Because I saw great potential in us
Because we have such a great chemistry

Why did it end?
I can't put it all into words
You said I overwhelmed you
Gosh, how I wish I could take all those overly personal questions back

Why didn't I think about what I wanted to say before I said it?
Because I'm impulsive
Because I have trust issues
Because your answers determined if I would be able to let my guard down

Why did you leave?
Because you're emotionally unavailable
Because I'm too much for you
Because maybe, just maybe, there was someone else