His wails put a knife to my chest
He can't comprehend the world
Where his mother went
Why his father is never to be seen
Why his family is struggling
Why strangers are so mean
Why school is frustrating
Why danger is obscene

His smile jammed the knife deep down
His mother is trying to get back up
But the only thing coming back up
Is her delayed dinner
He can't express himself
Without making a scene
He just wants to be normal
His normality is aware to me

His struggle pulled the knife out
I tell him that I love him
I laugh at his jokes
I pull his legs into bed at night
I check on his medication
I-I-I
How self centered I am
I need to try harder, stop his confused cries

His future helped me close my eyes
Say good night to the helpless
This strange little boy
That I describe in this rhyme
He is my brother
Can't even tell the time
But he can stand tall
When the world decides to fall

Broken? Yea that seems about right.
Heart broken? More or less.
How does one handle all the pain that comes with being broken?
How do you cope? How do I cope?
Everything is such a blur, nothing seems real anymore.

I want to go deeper
I want to feel the pain
But I'm scared that once I get there
I'll never go back again

Beneath the stars at night
I feel light, vacuously transcendent.
With only one request
Floating in my mind:
Breathe me.
So I will flow into
Your lungs—a vivifying expansion
Leading to the fleeting journey;
Something called “giving of life”
Where I circulate through your
Veins and be with you.
Yet I know that this
Moment is not to last;
In a few seconds you
Exhale—an action that is
Now perfunctory, flushing me out
Of your system without thinking
Twice about it at all.

But I leave happy.
For I have done my part
To keep you alive
For your next breath.

Drown your sorrows
not your friends