I was there all the time, while you were gone
One day you were there, the next day, gone
Everything was going good
So I never understood what went wrong
I never understood what I did so wrong
Because one day you were there
And the next day; bright, and early, gone
I never understood how another girl
Became your "number one"
Things started to turn south
When I noticed you were gone more
You'd make sure you were always quiet
When you managed to make your way home
And came through the door
Quiet as can be, so you didn't wake me up
Because you didn't want me to know
That you were actually out after work
With some girl who had a baby
Which made you look like a creep
How could you hit me below the belt, so deep?
You went and wandered the streets
Looking for someone else to satisfy
You and your petty selfish needs
You were playing house with someone else
Giving someone else the attention I was supposed to get
Not even caring to ask how I even felt
You hit me in the face one, slapped rather
That was a one time thing, not a big deal or matter
Because you hit me in front of my mother
And she told you point blank
"If you're going to hit my daughter;
You need to take a breath and really think"
And then I chimed in with;
"It's okay because if he ever tries or does it again;
I'll go to jail for breaking his **** hand."
The audacity this fool think he had
Cheated on me because I can't have kids
And he apparently wanted to be a dad
All you had to do was say something to me
That's something I would have come to understand
But instead you became unfaithful and left me sad
I really had feelings for you because I became obsessed
Starting going to work with you
And sitting in your vehicle for 8-12 hours like I was possessed
You drove me so crazy I didn't know what else to do
Then one day it all became clear
I wasn't needed anymore here
So I left, and never looked back.

Stephanie A. Ludwig
04/25/2025

mom said i'm spoiled
but i watched a spoiled girl cry
cause her mom sang her happy birthday
so am i really?

beberapa musim hujan di bulan november telah berlalu,
daun daun gugur dan menunggu untuk mekar kembali, banyak orang datang dan pergi
tidak ada seorang pun disini,
aku kembali menuliskan tentang hidupku
dan memeriksanya,
atas semua kesalahan yang telah kubuat,
dan aku takut,
aku mencoba membersihkan luka didalam diriku yang begitu dalam,

jadi aku berharap untuk melihatmu
bahkan jika kamu dapat melihat saya
saya tidak dapat melihat kamu,
aku menatap dinding hijau dan bertanya tanya
bisakah aku melihatmu sekarang?
bisakah aku memelukmu sekarang?
hanya kamu yang sabar saat aku kebingungan,
Lihat, orang berubah setiap saat
mereka tidak menyukai anda,
hari berikutnya mereka menyukainya
dan aku berharap semua orang bisa mencintaiku seperti dirimu mencintaiku


2025
reydmh

The crack in the sidewalk is my only comfort.
We've become friends overtime,
I tell her about the bottles and beer cans,
so lost I forget about the aches and pains.

She knows it's bad when I'm quiet.
I sit with the dark and listen to my sobs echo,
the rain can't drown out my thoughts.
The crack in the sidewalk is my only comfort.

Sometimes I go weeks without seeing her,
my identity drifts softly away with the tide.
Confused, I am too weak to find ground,
maybe it's best I cannot be saved.

The water leads me to my friend,
I shiver yet I cannot feel the cold.
She tells me that she's here for me,
the crack in the sidewalk is my only comfort.

I’ll take the test
And fail it on purpose
Because
I wanted to

Drowning in the ocean just to feel your skin,
Even though deep down i know you lust me.
Love is blind,
So I'd rather stay and live in a lie.
And the hot sand burns my feet,
I don't want to change you, i just want to love you.

Your beautiful eyes that i want to look at,
Your hair that i want to touch.
The sun makes me sweat,
Would it be okay to get your permission to feel your warmth?
Your flaws make me love more and more.
Even when i feel like you don't care anymore.

I swear im not evil,
I just want to feel you.
Skin to skin, lips to lips.
My only wish for this life.

Lord
As I’m washed clean by your blood
Please wash my ways as well
Reside within me
Belittle my desires
Let
Your
Love
Encapture my whole being
Leave no room for worldly interests  
I humbly beg O God
Please