I pray to God: make me new, make me clean,
Show me what this life could possibly mean.
I pray please fill my holes, make me whole,
Revive every weakness in my soul.

I pray clear my stage, shine the lights upon your glory,
Write my script, and guide me through my story.
I pray for the courage to put the pen in your hand,
To design my present fitting the future you planned.

I pray to practice thankfulness and to be more aware,
To seek your tiny treasures even when life isn't fair.
I pray for patience during this long waiting season,
So in every little thing I'll find meaning and reason.

I pray for the determination and control to stick to your path,
If I stray, I know you'll cleanse me in a grace-filled bath.
I pray for peace when things in life do not go as I hope,
You'll pick my heart up when my mind wants to mope.

I pray for the burning passion to strive for your perfection,
Having my eyes on you to point me in the right direction.
I pray for your comfort during rejection and pain,
Knowing your loss was our eternal gain.

I pray for the love I'll share with my family and friends,
For your amazing love has no boundaries nor ends.
I pray to share your friendship each and every day,
In time sharing your truths in your own special way.

I pray to be renewed and to be as clean as white snow,
So when seeking your love, through me people will know.
I pray thanksgiving for your mercy and grace so divine,
It fuels my fire to the world, letting my little light shine.

Be proud that you're stronger than razor blades. That takes courage and strength.
If you're not there yet, don't worry. One day you will be, if you just give it time darling.
You miss the relief and you kind of grow fond of your scars, and you probably don't regret it, but being Clean is a different kind of permanent relief that you will never regret.
You made it.

I run my hand along the traces of him.
I feel the blood rush through my skin.

I grip my shoulder where your head once rested.
I tear at my soul just to feel connected.

I feel the rage I should have felt eleven months ago,
I feel the desire I ought to forgo.

You were the best of all the others,
Their traces remain, but they weren't even lovers.

And neither were we, almost but not quite,
But you were the closest I have been to the shame free light.

I want to be clean of the stain he left,
I want to be clean of the desire I regret.

But as I look at this mark that you left on me,
I am not so sure I want to be free.

10 months and 25 days passed
or
35 days away
till it marks the day
that I finally realized
my life needs to stop involing  
a blade trembling my skin

its a day that
I refused to get hurt
by a boy
who was my everything.
but was causing
the blade across my skin.

blades
the pain it caused
emotionally and physically
I was addicted
I craved a little more
everytime
the wound started to heal

boy
the hurt it did
became a way I thought
of myself
and I didn't want to loose myself
as I was loosing every
addition to my life

10 months and 25 days later
im free
from the boy
that caused the pain I liked
im free from the medal
that I craved
everytime I ****** up
and life has never been better

That girl who locked herself in the room
took out a blade and stained it on her skin

I don't know her anymore

That girl who shoved ******* down her throat thinking that she would be skinny

I don't know her anymore

That one who showed her scars to the ones who cared.
And laughed at their advice because she thought hurting herself was the right thing to do.

I don't her anymore.

That girl who saw herself in a coffin,planned out her funeral because she wanted to die more than anything else.

I don't know her anymore.

That girl who saw only darkness in the tunnel,threw herself in a shell and hid from the world above.

I don't know her anymore.

That one who refused to chase her dreams.

*I don't know her anymore.

Well I'm here .... It's grose and ***** ....
My job is crystal clear!!!

I need to get this place back in shape...
I can't believe they live like this...
Like they're in the jungle living like some ape !!

I can't stand dirt and clutter and yucky grose walls....
I'm a germaphobe and cleanliness calls!!

there is no cure quite like for the dour
than clean pyjamas post-long-hot-shower.
with a sigh and a hug and flannel kisses to yer ***
hot shower/clean pyjamas: for when a day is done.