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To serve myself or serve the Divine,  
A choice that weighs heavy, a question of mine.  
In moments of struggle, I’ve turned away,  
Yet darkness followed, leading me astray.  

What can this world offer that’s truly good,  
That God hasn’t crafted, that’s misunderstood?  
I walk a path free from drink, smoke, or curse,  
In His love, I find joy, in His grace, I immerse.  

To ignore Him feels foolish, a path I can't tread,  
For serving my flesh would leave my spirit dead.  
Forget what He taught? No, that I won’t do,  
Why choose what He hates when His love is so true?  

Like children to parents, I seek His embrace,  
In guidance and wisdom, I find my true place.  
An all-loving Father, forgiving and kind,  
In prayer, I discover a peace intertwined.  

Nothing on earth can compare to His grace,  
In keeping my covenants, I find my safe space.  
So I ask once more, in this moment so real,  
Shall I choose my own will, or the love that I feel?  

My flesh may whisper, but my soul knows the way,  
In serving my God, I find peace every day.  
So let my choice echo, steadfast and true,  
For in serving the Lord, I find all I pursue.
Choosing yourself is also denying God.
In shadows deep, I lost my way,  
A sense of self, in disarray.  
Yet joy emerged, like morning's grace,  
God's light unveiled my hidden face.  

No longer bound by selfish chains,  
In devotion's arms, true freedom reigns.  
Miserable days, like hell on earth,  
Found purpose anew, a rebirth.  

Grateful heart, for love so wide,  
Forgiving hands, my faithful guide.  
I lost it all, yet gained the best,  
In God's embrace, I found my rest.  

Younger me, with questions bold,  
"Did we survive? Are we consoled?"  
I smile and say, "Yes, we are free,  
Only through Him, I truly see."  

For years I walked, in shadows cast,  
Believing love was lost, not meant to last.  
Yet now I reach with arms held high,  
Inviting sinners, come, don’t be shy.  

I’d have been lost, consumed by fear,  
In false delights that disappear.  
But with God’s strength, we stand as one,  
Together, the battle’s already won.  

So yes, I lost my sense of self,  
To find the soul I sought on shelves.  
In every flaw, I see the grace,  
For in His light, I’ve found my place.
A poem about losing yourself to find that God was always there.
josef Jul 17
Lord, why have you forsaken me?
Leading me to love one i cannot,
left without a home or bed

Jubilant Lord, why have you made me woeful?
Judas I have embodied, selling out myself,
jade eyes reflecting blankly

Lover, may my heart not utter prayers to
lie with those who don’t want me,
but may I lay with you, O My God
josef Jul 15
and as i walk along the brick road,
i look back and He’s there.
catching up beside me, He asked me
‘why do you abandon hope, and your
love.’ i say that he will never feel the same
and i’ve come to accept it.

He went on to say, ‘blessed are those
who are pure in heart - and you, my child
gave him the purest form of love you could
the same agape that I give you’

my soul rejoiced for His words, and
i’m reminded of how he suffered so I
may feel for anyone without sin

i love god more then him, but i
show them the same type of love.
one reciprocated in action, the other didn’t.
There was a time not so long ago when my head hung down and my spirits were low
Forever in a funk and moving slow
I needed a pick-me-up to help me go
My spirits were crushed and I had no faith in trust
Down on myself and feeling pretty low
My back against the wall with nowhere to go
God came calling
He showed himself to me
In all of his glory, he made me see
How much better life can be……
If I believe in his story
Believe in his faith
Believe in the sacrifices that he made
I can live each day better than the rest
No longer broken beaten and depressed
I can live without worry
Without hate
In Jesus name, God is great!
Up until recently, when I was diagnosed with cancer, I had lost my faith and all belief in a higher power during that time of being faithless I was left, wondering what was out there for me when that day comes and at some point, I begin to realize it’s a pretty empty feeling I can’t tell you exactly what made me. Find my faith again but if you’re reading this poem, you can obviously see that it has entered my life once again in a big way, and I find comfort in knowing that there is someone watching over us, and when my time comes no matter how soon or far away that is, I will be at peace in the next life, even if you don’t believe in the good Lord above, just know that I am praying for you and I’ve got enough faith for us all.
akoetry Jun 11
You have chosen me again and again, Father.

When things feel empty and I am in a state of nothingness,
my options are either to isolate or escape from the real world.
It's unproductive, but it keeps me safe from the world.
Safe, but it's unproductive.
Safe, but it's running away from the things that truly matter.
Safe, but I locked my door to the only one who understands me the most.

He who sees me.
He who knows my pains and carries them as His own.
He who embraced me despite my rebellion.
He who accepted me for who I am.
Incomplete and flawed.

He who completes me.

As I write this at 2 in the morning,
5 hours of sleep, barely stretched,
I write in deep admiration, gratitude, and love
for the Father who stayed by my side.

My Father,
He whom I feared to face because of my flaws and sins.
He whom I believed was disappointed in everything in me because I couldn't fulfill my role as His child.
But my Father isn't like that,
I was wrong.
Despite my fears and my self-criticism,
He continued to be by my side.

He stood by my storms and my empty calms,
sending messages of love and acceptance—that I will always be
His child.

Sure, I can isolate myself from the rest of the world and hide somewhere where the light doesn't know,
but God can always find me.
It was I who pushed Him away.
It was I who was too ashamed to face God.
But in His eyes, despite being broken and tattered,
I was still as lovable.

I was incomplete and unheard,
but God knows it all.
No running away can flush away my mistakes and regrets.
God knows it all.

God knows everything,
so why run away?

But God already forgave me,
it was I who wasn't able to realize that.
I chose to lock my heart and "deal" with all of this by myself,
I was wrong, extremely wrong.
I was a rebel.
I am unworthy of Him,
but He loves me still.

I was wrong.
I was wrong.
I was wrong.
"I was wrong," I say again and again.

So this time and 'til the end of time,
I will do things right.
I will always choose You.
the resolution to "Nothing" :]
Anioł Jun 5
This is who I die for, Lord
I’m sorry I say this in Thy Holy Name
But it is not You whom I pray to nor praise

I am down on my knees for a new God

He does not judge me
He does not lash me for my sins
For He is my sin

His touch feels like the sunshine on my face
And He tastes of milk and honey
-
His voice is like a song of the sirens
And His scent is oh so alluring

And I cannot feel you, Lord!
How can I believe
When my real God is right here in front of me?
Before my eyes & before my touch

How could I not praise His Holy Name?
For it feels serene on my tongue
And Yours only when I’ve sinned
When I am on my knees
And begging for mercy

If I shall not lie with a male
As with a woman
Color me the abomination

I no longer worship those I fear
For it only comes with consequences

No God would bare His teeth
When His creations use their will as they please

We do not bite the hand that feeds
For the hand has been empty
And we are starving

His Name rings in my head
Like church bells on Sunday Morning
I want to pray to Him
-
To my never-faltering obsession

Send me to Hell
Because for all I care
My experience with Him
Felt like Heaven
male pov
"I a-washed the world to get rid of the sin.
My mistake was not letting it all flood,
including Noah and the animals,
I should have started it all from fresh"

" Sin is worse than it has ever been, the powerful
prey on the weak and the desolate"

" There's no saving a tree once the bark has been
totally stripped of its distinguished features"

" I should have realized free will is desirable,
since the apple's been bitten, there's left a black core
of all the thieves, black hearts and the ******"

" The sun gives raise to the tripping over the homeless.
The night gives birth to the terror of home invasions"

"Free will is the sin I myself will have to answer to.
My crime is above those of the subjects I unleased"
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