I fell like silence breaking,
a scream that never made it out,
the wind folding around me
like arms that never did.

Now, I wake in a room
stitched with wires and cold light,
where the air tastes of bleach
and every surface hums with life
that isn’t mine.

The machine speak in beeps
soft, exact, unfeeling.
Beep.
I’m still here.
Beep.
I failed.
Beep.
I failed.

They say the sound is good.
They say the beeping means I’m stable.
But it only reminds me
that death didn’t want me.
That earth opened its arms
and still let me go.

The noise wraps around my head
like a shroud of neon thread.
It winds through the hollow
in my chest,
settling where the fall had emptied me.

I hate its voice,
its small, insistent hope.
It has no right to be so calm
when everything inside me
is still falling.

I close my eyes,
but there’s no peace.
Just the beep,
beep,
beep,
dragging me back
from the edge I chose.

And I want to ask the silence
why it let me go.
Why it handed me back
to this world of white and wires,
to these strangers with clipped voices
and pity in their eyes.

But silence won’t speak here.
Only the machines do.

Beep.
I’m still alive.
Beep.
I’m still alive.
Beep.
God, why?

I hang my head down low
When the mask falls and everybody knows,
Don't look through my windows,
Shades closed, I'm ok because they say so.
I'm not ok but I make those jokes
So they don't see real pain,
They don't see emotional strain.
Tried to fix the engine but it blows up.
Back on a clean slate, inside ready to erupt
No look he's normal, he must be great.

Don't talk about it, just walk around it
Look how happy the little clown is
I pull these balloons so they go loose,
Blow them up and tie my noose
Hung up until I deflate too soon
Playing that pop goes the weasel tune.

Beep

I’m going to go out there

Beep

I mean this is just

Beep

ridiculous

BEEP

I’m not even mad at-

BEEP

whoever broke in, I-

BEEP

just want to sleep

beep beep

So you are lost in dreams so deep whole night
And I long to hear phone's beep whole night



At dawn, I realised, my awakening
Though my destiny remained asleep whole night



I know the remedy, I know the toxin..
What to lose, and what to keep whole night



She might have waited for me to take her back
This is what made me to weep whole night



Sharafat, night is to sleep, not to write
Don't let enemies to creep whole night