i bare myself in word-song to share
in rhythm and sound,
to release this pressure in crisp,
light notes-- palatable.
to share sordid beauty
that i've yet to understand,
to let you know you're not alone.
to dig to the core of something likely awful,
nasty, and stupid, and reason with it to
kindness and love.
i bare myself to understand
and be understood.

****** masks
As we look around,
All we see is humans wearing ****** masks
A world of silencers, a world of social distancing:
Before we use to sit silently and watch the world
Around us:  misbehaved: the unruly bunch

Silence is holy it draws attention
To our inner peace:  today is the silence of the mask
Draws attention to fear, a fear of us being side track
By this disease, so we wear the mask of silence,
Do you remember, the measles, chickens pox’s
Scarlett fevers and the list when on:
But it’s nothing in comparisons to corona corvid 19

Lockdown: Now it’s staying at home means getting creative
Evaluating our lives, our behavior, our life style..
Was it out of control?  
Were we ever essentials?

  I hate wearing the mask
It make me feel like a captive, but i know better
Not to wear it: I need protection from you
And you need protection from me.

Because of what Mr. Trump said “the Chinese disease.”
Wearing the mask to do the tasks
Letting go of the hatred enable us to move forward

A world without humans is not a world
Is a silence world:
with one small flower emerging from a rock on a side walk

I am the maneless lion among the pride
The white horse among the herd
The black swan among the flight
The hornless ram among the flock
The flightless bee among the hive
The clawless kitten among the litter

Yes, I am different
But that's what truly makes me a wonder

Are you still harsh?
Why am I still scared of you?
Slow down and tell me,
Do you love like a sister now?
Can you protect like a brother?

I need to know
See, I took all this time to ease the pain inside
Stitch all the wounds and cover the scars within

I'm learning to love again
It's a process
It might be too slow for you, I fear
Is it safe?
Is there any need for all this amour?

Please let me know in time...

You said you were the one
You said that  you were it
But you were wrong
You claimed I needed to be with you
So I clung to you
I needed you to simply be
Because i thought that you were me
I thought living was inside my head
I thought performance was winning
And equated with existence.
Every part of you is not me
Though I've grown with you
And traced you back to the age of three
You are not me but merely a distraction
From seeing the ethereal before me
From living out the plays inside my head
From conforming to the reality that attention is not needed
Recognition is not imperative
Success is not vital
To live extraordinarily.
You are just a distraction from who I need to be
And as I fall and trip and stumble back into the pleasure of your continuous movie reel
I see the world and I see me and I remember the presence of who I am supposed to be
All in the moments that you are not there
And still I struggle
But I know now that you are not who I was destined to be,
And maybe I’m not special
Or all i thought I’d be
But with you, I’ll never reach my dreams
And I’ll never reach me
Until I hit pause on the remote
And eject this fantasy DVD.