at first, you were two burnished
roses, so pure and bright that i
thought you were made of gold.

you were spiritual parents to me &
taught me right from wrong, and told
me that i wasn't good enough, but that
you were great enough for all of us.

you placed a dunce cap on my head,
but you painted them gold and called them
crowns, and i believed you, you coward.

you kissed my brow, sweetly, softly,
like a vampire caresses his victim's neck,
before he plunges deep & ***** the red
from their veins.

you cradled my throat in your claws
and told me that no one else was
on my level, that no one else
could get this close to you.

i told you i dreamed of becoming a
writer, you told me to burn my journals.
i told you i dreamed of becoming a
painter, you told me to trash my brushes.

i gave you the key to my secret dreams,
to my most vulnerable place, & you
swallowed it whole, like a greedy sparrow.

for 3 years, you dangled my stolen heart
in front of me, & laughed as i chased it like
the hog-tied mule that i had become.

then one day, you got lazy & you slipped
up, you fool, you left the key & my heart
on that pedestal you brazenly sit upon.

i took it back, i swallowed my heart &
unlocked my spirit, free at long last,
and saw that you were the Wizard of Oz,
hiding behind your ratty curtains.

i laughed & i cried, when i realized
what a fool i had been, how childish
i had been, to willingly give you
my life.

you were nothing but stones dipped
in glistening blood, drained from the
blind people you feast upon, you glutton.

you broke my spine & you tried to
**** my spirit, but you didn't know,
I am the Phoenix Rising, &
you will not hold me any longer.

Floating.

Sinking.

Gently resting on the surface of the water.

Gently falling into its depths.

Peaceful.

Timeless.

Held in its gentle embrace.

Surrounded by silence, stillness, darkness.

Not drowning, never drowning.

Becoming one...
  One with the water.
    One with the silence.
      One with the stillness.

One... with the darkness.

Floating.

Sinking.

Free.

As long as I'm still breathing,
Alive and somewhat aware,
My heart will continue beating,
Although right now I'm gasping for air.

time no longer flows,
in this piece of peace I've found;
in a place that no one knows
a place where nature has been crowned.
a place without pollution
with a limitless solution
to the **** of body, mind and soul;
the way the world tries to take control.
a place where freedom
is everyone's prize
we're ALL part of the kingdom
ruled by the same skies.
this place exists
in the souls of the masses
a place that permits
those from all creeds, colors, classes.
a place that's not perfect
for we flourish with flaws
but a place that is worth it
for one, and for all.

The sun has risen already, has hidden
Already behind the clouds that
Cover this town and all
Its ***** little secrets.
Bees surround me with sound
To blot out the profound thoughts
Swimming around in my mind
Without a hope to find
An answer to life.
What once was a tree is now
A path for the power lines,
We cut down what lies in the way
Of a "better day" where screens
Dictate what it means to be alive.
How can I see what's next when
There is no magical text to give
Me solace when my heart pounds
And the silence shakes the ground
Beneath my weary feet.
We're drones on our phones put
On a path lain out by the wrath
Of ages, progression or regression
Depends on your perspective.

You hide behind a curtain of insecurity,
blushing and allowing your eyes to fall
to the floor when they give you kind words
to follow and acknowledge. Deflection
is a skill so fine tuned and honed
that it's innate, a reflex built
into your body. Yet you never stopped
to think that they never had to say
those lovely things
and they chose to anyway because they truly
believed them. Perhaps it's time
for you to believe them too.

Not every morning shines bright
Not every night is without the light
But everyday is a fight
so hold your fists tight
to remain awake and aware till the goodnight!