She’ll be lovely. You’ll be able to count the spaces in between her ribs. She’ll have thin skin and it’ll be so easy to drive her crazy with just a single touch. It’ll be easy to make your mark on her, too. She’ll bruise easy and love it. She’ll think it’s beautiful.

2. She won’t ever be expensive on dates because all she’ll order is a salad. You’ll never have to worry about her ordering an expensive steak. You might have to worry about emergency room bills when she passes out, but she’ll never ask for anything else. All she’ll want is ***** and sleeping pills.

3. She will always put you first. Your needs always come before hers because she was raised “God first, others second, I am third”. She’ll make you hot chocolate and drive to your house at 3 AM with pizza she won’t eat, even though she’s dead tired and all she wants is a good night’s rest. You can count on her to be there.

4. She will tell you that you are perfect. She’ll believe it, too. Everyone around her seems to be perfect and she’s drowning under the weight of mediocrity but it’s ok as long as you know how perfect you are.

5. She’ll always have scissors and pencil sharpeners on hand. The knives in her kitchen are always sharpened to perfection and if you forget your razor at home, it’s ok. She has extras in her closet.

6. She’ll ******* anytime you want. As long as you don’t look at her while she’s getting undressed, she’ll love you until she can’t breathe anymore. She’ll smile as you kiss her thighs because you’re the only one that makes her feel beautiful.

7. Date a girl who hates herself because she’ll love you.

I found some jeans in my closet
They are from last year
I got really excited
I decided to try them on
They didn't fit over my thighs
It really made me cry
I know I have gained weight
These jeans are just another reason why
I am going to give starving another try.
I will fit into those jeans
Even if I die trying.
They hang in my closet with a smile
Just mocking me as I stuff my face with food. They are killing me. I'm killing me. Food is not worth it.

If you feel hungry
Drink water.
Drink as much water as you can.
Still hungry?
Go take a shower.
Take four showers for all I care.
Still hungry?
Draw a picture.
Paint your toenails.
Do anything except eat.
Someone just offered you food.
What are you going to do?
Are you going to eat it?
Are you going to waste your whole day?
Eating doesn't help anything.
You aren't even hungry.
You are the problem.
Why would you make yourself fatter?
Why feed the problem?
Stop.
Put it down.
Say no.

This is what I go through every single day.
I am getting so tired.
It *****.

I have twisted mind, my souls bent out of shape.
I’m reaching out, screaming but it’s much too late
The demons mind’s made up, there’s no turning back
My bags have been packed and my shoes are laced up
I don’t want this I don’t but the benefits I reap
Are too much and that I don’t wish to cease
Shut my mouth walk right on by
The scale is where my mind lies
Holding out on this is all that I know
A size 1 will not do at all
The demon lies in me she knows what she wants
And like it or not she’ll get it all in time
For my body, life, soul are all that’s at risk
She needs what she takes and I need what she gives.

ocean tides
carry sea salt
onto the quiet shore
only to wash it away

And I didn't talk to anybody for weeks. I just went through my daily deeds as if they were engraved in my mind and I was programmed on everything I did. I felt like a robot. I mean, I felt nothing after the night I felt everything. I will never understand how one could embrace someone in hatred. I thought his arms were made for loving and I thought the enticing looks he spared me meant something more than my body.

You extinguished my hopes,
and you shattered the bones
protecting my heart. You
single handedly ripped the
breath from my lungs saturating
every atom with your presence.
I suppose though it's okay that
you hurt me because life isn't
always fair. And the ones we
love don't always infatuate
themselves into us in the
alikeness in which we did to
them.

I watched as a bird
(Perched upon a limb)
Fell to the water
(And drowned from inside him)
I wanted to save it
(But there was no purpose I could serve)
It sank deeper each day
(With its own mind as a life preserver)
I filled lungs when it needed to breathe
(But God needs you to get air on your own)
I wanted it to float
(i think it wanted to drown)
Wings are meant for flying in the clouds
(Not swimming in the sea)
So when you throw that empty bottle
(Please God just don't hit me)

although I'm not sure how much more pain you can cause me

Shards lay amidst the ground
All of this house and not a sound
The screams from my dreams keep me awake
Put down the ******* bottle for ***** sake
You are killing yourself every drop that goes in
This is by far your most damaging sin
You say that when you drink the ***
It lessens the feeling you compare to as numb
Baby I come home and your passed out on the floor
You'd never even know who walked through that door
I grab the bottle right out of your hands
I wake you up and prepare you to stand
You fall to your knees and grasp my bruised feet
I fear it is in hell we will once again meet
Watching you die everyday is not easy on me
Please just get it over with so I can finally sleep

From an innocent age
I have always held an inborn fondness for winter
The way the cold air brought people together inside
And the fact that no snowflake was ever the same.
But as I have increased in age
I have found less redundant things that appeal to me about the Jack Frost season
For I now relate the the way everything freezes over
And you cannot feel the tips of your fingers
And new comfort has been located in the elongated periods of darkness
And I have found a deeper meaning
In the way snow falls, but doesn't always make it to the ground