how unlucky
Some people's cells are made of life
but they're not blessed to live
And some of us,
are forced to talk and smile
and shine and walk
and appear
-I want to disappear-
and dance and pretend
and again
and again
and-

All we want to do is fly
or die
It's pretty much the same thing
How unfair

Just before I thought of you
I was happy
Happy on my own
But then you made me feel
Whole again
Which never lasted
Illusion and too good to be true
But even with my last sense of life
I still wish you happiness and
Nothing less
Maybe one day
I will be courageous enough
To be back again
With my whole self
On my own again

I'm left with that feeling again
A hole thats so deep
It could inhabit the dead
I feel like a zombie
I've got depression I guess
But most importantly
I'm living life as though it's pretend
Here we go again
I'm ****** in the head
There's no light in this tunnel
I can't see where it ends
I'm lost
A living nightmare of ghosts instead
I have a monster taunting me
Sharing my head
Here we go again

I keep chasing lightning
Trying to catch it, lock it in a bottle
but when I do the bottle cracks
and I’m left empty-handed

Maybe I just don’t have what it takes
Maybe it’s not meant to be
Maybe I don’t know what I really want
Maybe I should let the passion wash away

I keep trying to start over with you
You say I need independence
The decisions should be mine
You say, “Maybe you need love too”
And I realize I don’t think I could take it if you walk away
But there ain’t nothing to do
And I should let it go

I keep trying to start over with me
Maybe I should listen
Get some medicine
Make it pink, I’ll swallow it
But would I be me?
And would you still love me?
And will the sadness go away, or will I just be numb to it?

Lightning brings thunder
Lightning brings grey storms
Why can’t you love me like lightning?
The way I love you
Because I keep losing track of you
And I, I don’t want to listen
Because I keep losing touch with you
And you, you don’t want to listen

I keep chasing lightning
Trying to catch it, lock it in a bottle
but when I do the bottle cracks
and I’m left empty-handed

One more time, one more time.
I’ll just do this one more time.
One last time and I’ll be fine.
I’ll just do this one more time.

One more time, one more time,
The crimson red is such a beautiful sight.
One more time and I’ll be fine.
Let me just do this one more time.

One more time, one more time.
The silvery gleam greets me once again.
One last time, I’ll be fine.
I’ll just do this one more time.

One more time, one more time,
Fresh roses are piling around me.
Is that you? Cruel angel of the world?

Take me away, one last time.

Its been a while
I trusted someone with my heart
took me long to realized
that's happiness can disguise

what is good in lies?
they can be much better than truth sometimes...
what is good in goodbyes?
they can be the best action of letting a hidden crime...

this heart has been through so much more than you thought it could
but this won't be the last time, I'll love somebody again...
someone who deserves and I can share my life and love for good...
no matter if we fight as long as we can mend each other's pain...

Today begins the slow build
The magnificent path,
The Great Work.
Our break, needed.
The path we're on, so lovely.

Thank you, Honeybee.
You're my world

I saw you. And this time, it was different. This time I really saw you. I looked into your eyes, and saw the man I fell in love with, saw that innocence that I once tasted.

I talked to you. And this time I really heard you. Listened carefully to that voice that was once the sweetest lullaby I longed to hear.

I didn’t really say much, but we don’t need words, you and I. I know you got through my every thought, I saw it your eyes, that now you know. You know I’m still the old me, that I’ve been crippled inside out since you went away.

Today I fell in love with you all over again, and today your distance is no more an obstacle. Because right now, no matter where you are, I can feel you near me, and no matter what you’re doing, I can feel you holding me.

Honey today I can say that I’m whole again, you filled my empty heart and all it took was a glance at your smile.

I guess some things will never change, the burst in your eyes, the sound of your laughter and the joy you bring into my life, just by being near. Because even when everything changes, I still love you the same.