you told me
you broke up with her.
congratulations.

i’m still nothing more
than heat under covers,
wearing
the silent regret
of my own shame,

whilst my reflection,
revolted, stares back
at what i became.

i was sick of being
put in a box
labelled, ready to send.

i looked up holidays,
knowing if i didn’t stop,
i’d drop dead.

but even the thought
of going felt too much.

still, i clicked complete.
seats reserved
on the eurostar.

anything else
than being the other woman —
the one people fall for
when their hearts
should be sealed,
not crossed.

i need to reclaim
some of my old self
i’ve lost along the way.
maybe that’s a start.

it’s got to be enough.

i don’t know his last name.
or anything, really.
we both whispered,
don’t be a serial killer,
don’t be a lunatic.
it was sort of beautiful.
strangely poetic.
my hair still smells like him,
and he’s given me a gift,
a quiet relief:
she’s no longer
the last person i kissed.

We met in a lonely place
A look of curiosity reflected on my face
You took the seat next to mine
With a camera-ready smile
I rolled my eyes and downed my wine
You were wearing my husband’s cologne
With a cheesy joker’s grin
You knew I’d be all alone
And that I was desperate enough to sin
I woke up beside you in some hotel
What looked like heaven was hiding hell
But by then you knew me too well
How I’d rather die than go off by myself

You took me to places I’d never been before
We stayed up all night living scenes of  folklore
I warned you about the coming storm, you insisted we’d be fine
That was when you whispered, “I know you’re unhappy. So am I.”
Your face imprinted in my mind
Tapping my foot, anxiously waiting outside
I anticipate your signal under the moonlight’s glow
To this day I still know exactly when and where to go

We proceeded to meet in dark alleyways
I never noticed how close we were to your place
Even with my guilt I still could never get enough
Who knew someone with eyes so gentle could ever be so rough?
Our spouses turned a blind eye, we took it as a sign and carried on
Now the line is blurred between what is right and what is wrong
My friends can’t resist their sly remarks
They notice the spark reigniting in my eyes
You mended my broken and barren heart
But you’ll never be mine

For 6 long months we lived in the shiniest fables
Sneaking out almost every night, I have the path memorized
But it didn’t take long before our land became unstable
It all came crashing down, I was crushed by the weight of our lies
When the sirens rang you were nowhere to be found
You left my cold body to bleed on the ground
The look in your face is all I can remember now
You were unhappy and I was your way out
You held my broken frame
Somehow, there was always somebody else to blame
Now I’ll never be the same
No, we’ll never be the same

Now I sit at our table all alone
Trying desperately to erase the markings you made on me
The place we proudly called home
Has become the setting in tragedies
I stare at my reflection and remember your touch
What once brought me back to life now only hurts so much
Our bed became my tomb
Now I can’t escape the ghost of you

All I wish to do is forget now
But it’s hard to when you’re plastered all over town
The secrets and stories we both passed down
Someday you’ll leave my mind but I don’t know how
They say you’re still nowhere to be found

sometimes i wake
from a fever-dream
spent with a mystery being –
evaporating too quickly
to savour
leftover feelings,
and hidden benefits
of a midnight affair
with someone
that doesn't exist.

when the day
is half gone,
i'm still lovesick,
incapable of
stopping my mind
from hoping
there’s a button somewhere
to hit re-wind.

velvet-soft touch,
a rainbow sunrise,
naïve smiles
reflected in your eyes.

caribbean lightning,
words written in sand,
goosebumps rising
up my arm, down my hands.

tropical jungle,
a caressing breeze,
sun-kissed freckles
spilling over me.

sweat-drenched longing,
a turquoise bay,
your quiet glance
burning like fate.

scorching sunlight,
hunger in flames,
a mariachi chorus
dancing 'round the blaze.

spanish murmurs —
'vamos al bar',
your family waits
with mezcal in a jar.

bare feet wandering,
a crimson sky,
the sea kisses shells
the tide leaves behind.

seductive darkness,
a star-scattered dome,
the high-risen moon
spins legends of home.

a gentle touch,
chestnut-brown eyes,
beneath the palms,
desire comes alive.

laughing gulls,
a tide that won’t part —
and in this sand
i bury my heart.

his eyes are what graze his meal,
while he pokes at it with a fork, like a child

she asks in a sweet voice, if there’s
anything on his mind…

with a full plate, leftovers of his love
for her, and an empty pride - he finally asks
her

“did you also tell him you love him, right
after I watch you both kiss each other”

splat!

her spoon crushes pieces of food on her plate,
my love, I swear to you, it was only ONE TIME

he smiles, but in a sombre voice he replies,
“funny, with such a passionate kiss I watched,

I’m sure the both of you had a lot of practice”