Two people, faces on
A screen, and two
Voices telling us how we should be
What’s new in the world, why we should
Avoid doing this, avoid doing that
What’s in, what’s not, what we should all do best

I see some nods
I see disapproval, approval
I see shifty glances in eyes
I see mouths start to move and talk
I see phones, many phones
I see the consumerism kicking in
I see unwavering doubt

I see lies, a mirage
I see the contours of deception
I see material eyes and material hearts
I see heavy minds and empty heads
I see people wondering about how they should look instead
I see people dreaming of a better life
I see people forgetting their own beautiful life
I see insecurity, stinging idiosyncrasy
I see flaming ******* media hypocrisy
I see romanticization of all things ugly
I see faces that look so young and glossy
I see big lights that cancel out all the imperfections
I see makeup that covers all the unwanted
I see ivory and I see bone
I see a curated life that I’ve never known
I see this image stitched up
And I never see it become unsewn

I wanted you
To love
To care for
To show you
How it felt.
I wanted to feel it with you.
And as I stare at everyone else,
I remember you.
Spent too much time figuring out
What I did wrong,
I forgot to move on.

The waves of these oceans
Crash upon my drowning body.
Seeing patterns in the sun,
Slowly slipping from the reality
I've been placed in.

As water fills my lungs, I dig for open land
But water fills my open hands,
And I know what to expect.

Let's dissect this thought process.
I understand now that my slowly slipping mind will leave me drowning in the fear
Of peers fearing for me.
I'll begin to Forget things they said,
And things I love as this insanity consumes me.

After the day is over

And the thrush begins lullabies.

I need to escape from this tiredness

By going into sweet delight.

Softly like heaven's fleece

Those eyelids close in thought.

I'm in a state so easily forgettable

Yet one that I like the most.

he spends money like its an ocean tide
as soon as it's gone more takes its places
he knows that it won't stop coming
i save money like rain in a desrt
it comes rarely and when it does its small
im grateful for my rain but sometimes i look at his ocean
and compared to him the water in my cupped hands seem so small

I wish my wishes were more possible or at least more tangible
my wish for happiness is impossible to fulfill
happiness doesn't come in bottles I can drink or pills I can swallow
it comes in waves and never stays long
my wish for people to change is also a difficult one
there is no one that you can change except yourself
I wish that they were realistic so instead when I fall I have something to reach for, a goal or a dream that could be accomplished, instead of grasping at air