lost in the darkness of your missing
I watch the stars wink as if it's all ok
endless seconds drawl by
lethargic, spiritless
a complete antithesis to my eager waiting
the door  does not herald your lively eyes
that hand does not warmly reach for me
that warmth does not envelop me

the soul that sustains me
calls my eyes up to the heavens
a genltle reminder that you are waiting
I wait the endless seconds in unpassed time
thankful at least, there are enough stars

Folder: Heart aesthetics
Something reached in,

pulled my heart out and left me behind

still scrambling for bearings

don't know left from right

you did a number on me,

i don't know if I can last the fight

that raging fire you pushed inside

has burned up all reason

i hunt for you, night and light

my loves death for your treason

drip by drip, drop by drop

I died a thousand times

through crimson tracks

chasing your shadows

through endless seasons

you don't want it but you wont give it back

i see those lies in your eyes

the hurt I saw inside

just a trick.

You'd think I'd have known better

crimson drips splatter

leaving me behind.

A sharp love is keen
The heart cuts as easily
Katanas nature

Inspiration has run dry
the day closes gray
The morning a darker shade
questions hang above unanswered
The night sky lost its glitter
fruit of the spirit turned bitter
Lines drift into oblivion
poetry is a ****

d



Hold it.
Wrap fingers around it.
Squeeze gently.
slowly release.
Drag fingers downwards.
Twist slightly.
Slowly release.
Drag fingers upwards.
Downwards again.
Grip firmly
pull forward
Twist slightly upwards
Slowly release
Squeeze gently
Curl back
That's it
Now go faster
And repeat till you get the hang of it
and That's how you write the letter d
with correct finger placement.
Great job!

The days blur from one shade of gray to another
haphhazard heart only beats when the possibility of entering your atmosphere nears,
and even then, reality is quick to set in.
abandoned left to my own devices in matters concerning love
how easy it would be,
if it could leave you and nestle back into my heart again
ready to flutter off and settle on some other worthy occupation
bursting with colours like your eyes rivers of warmth like your smile
you walk through me as if I didn't exist
you build walls as you walk creating a maze around you
and yet, memories must linger, sparking  as you catch them in my eyes and smile into my soul, another torturous moment,
Perhaps, on purpose to check in with your prisoner.
Cleary, I have nothing but trophy status gathering dust.
An urn with the ashes of our love smoldering with no air
I wait for the last ember to burn off white
but that's the miracle of love,
it exists on nothing at all
and still stupidly, I design our reunion with not even a hope at all
and nothing to gain,  except living once again, lost in your eyes,
for a lighter shade of gray.
Author's Notes/Comments:

Folder: When the going gets tough
Oh drama please just *******!

i DONT KNOW HOW YOU FIND ME

i DONT CARE.

I would very much like for conflict to resolve

but in my sphere always seem to revolve.

I turn my back on you, though its only a temporary measure

because you are not one to be denied your pleasure.

you sick stalker **** mistress of distress and bad luck,

you come in guns blazing

and you catch me unawares

you call out jealousy

pride

and mis understanding

a gulity line up in this dramatic parade

but its you I most revere when you are giving someone else a hell of a year,

I am officially breaking up with you.

dont try to find me

I am passionately in love with compassion

and I will die rather than leave this heaven.

thankyou for being my depth stick

I would never have seen how beautiful my new love is

if it wasnt for all your selfish darkness.

kind regards

SS

this is not your ******* wonderland
its my life.
my dimension
my frequency.
step the *******
and take your hatter with you
that Cheshire grin and all manner of sin
your schizoprenic dialogue
bores me to tears
you don’t have any relevance here
I’m off creating my world with my head
I don’t need your kind of body counts
I live in hope not fear
I said good bye Long ago  to your flouts
stop trying to hold on to me
let me go
your time was never
synched
I was never a part of you
and your lies though sweet
tasted untrue
now you wonder why you’re lynched?
false eyes and false hearts
I saw you had no soul
thtas why you wanted mine
so **** much
but I knew
and now it’s time
for you to ******* too
i have no time for your pills and ills
im off to make a garden
with Mary
shes quite contrary you know
she cuts off heads
and lays pretty maids in rows
about time she became compost
and you can rot with her
as you are transpfromed
by the light into a garden of free thought
creation and beauty
for the lack of a soul
i will keep mine
intact
and from it only truth
and love
will grow

Forever intended to circle but never trace the puckered skin of my aching lips

Untasted you take away from all that is beauty as my mind chooses unwitting ly to coalesce upon the ghost of you

There is no life sufferable without you in it, no cause too great to overcome yet there is a flaw,

For our loves gain double an equal measure must be afforded lost, For there in lives its worth. Oh my dearest love,  as selfish as I pray I need to be, can only reek of compassion thus,

You **** me softly every smile, every soulful look, every sweet word veiled with bitterness

an aquired taste for those addicted to love's misdirection

The outline for my sweet destructon,

And you my favourite design.

Congratulations another consecutive win
******* central made it clear
You're the biggest family of ******* every year
There is no rival that can compare
Sponging off us and can't see
The burden we bare
Well the cost of your unbeaten record consumes us
while your respect is something refused us.
our dignity is intact never stooped as low to air the trash talk
We'd rather hold our heads high and walk.
But the ******* of the year can enjoy paying rent
because this finance bubble debt needs a good dent
dont worry I know youll all object,
with the usual ******* excuses  to that effect
but when we asked for assistance which you had the ease of doing
you said no, get someone else and audaciously bunked right in.
Go live in rip off ******* home theyve got a big roof.
I should know i paid for it
I expect more crap but I hear ******* of the year is up for grabs!
Go for it! I'm sure youll win
Regards from the newly crowned,
******* ***** of the year.

The dream starss fell from her eyes so easily after they vilely wrestled her one brightest hope away from her. The one with all the colours of love and happiness streaming out into infinity. She bent down and collected them one by one and laid them out again in the shape of her hope and pressed them there till they stuck.
But it wasnt the same she kept worrying they might fall off.

---!!!---



Don't speak of tragedy

like it was nearly avoided.



Don't speak of love

as if you never had it.



Don't live as if

we never knew.



Don't speak of me

as if I was no one.



Dont make ordinary

our extraordinary.



Don't speak of denials

or missed chances.



It was a once in many lifetimes

And now after so long,

our eyes meet.





I saw.

It was all there again

in your eyes.



Don't speak.



The sounds

only drown

in the waterfalls

falling from your lies.



--!!!--

I don't want to know their name
I don't want to know who they are
I don't care if they make you feel
they aren't me.

Not me,
who's cradling your head in my hands
or wrapped around you thigh deep
or gently coupled by the lips
slung over your bed sheets
resting over your heartbeat
tracing the lines of your love
tipping your chin,
looking deep into your soul
and you meeting me there.

It was too real to ever let go
but you did
please don't explain
I don't want to know

her lovely songs filled my hearts pages

in heart and words she was all a flutter

now shes gone how my heart ache rages

only loves sweet words ne'er a mutter



as all her lightness danced upon my soul

ebroidered words so beatifully sewn

came back each time to feel her warm glow

but not tonight i fear she has flown,



ne'er was a sadder occasion than it twas

when my lovely dovely twas discovered lost...



where are dovely without you im lost!!!

you might break off and run away,

but the sick stalker **** has the luck,

to find every bad thing that will cause life to ****,

you can run but never hide,

that drama **** has nothing but luck on their side!

Don't let anyone shake the dream stars from your eyes.

For every one that falls a dream dies.

Let the stars shine on,

keep that twinkle in your eyes and each day

remember to reach for the skies!

Don't let anyone shake the dream stars from your eyes.
For every one that falls a dream dies.
Let the stars shine on,
keep that twinkle in your eyes and
Each day remember to reach for the skies!

dumb people can't speak
deaf people can't hear
blind people cant see
stupid people can't think
ignorant people can't understand
even when they think they can.

Like butterflies
Leaving a trail
of coloured crystals,
only in my dreams
can I see you
for all you could be;
Like feathers
floating down
gently glittering
in the warm sun,
like a soft doona
Chrisp and fresh
lightly crunching as
I fall into its hug,
like all the things
I never have time
to feel, or do, thankful
in my imagination
I can still see you,
in my soul
I can still feel
the traces of
soft flutters, hugs, glitter
and coloured crystals
that tear my heart
like grains of sand
in a dust storm
in this wasteland
after your passing.

Add another sleepless night to the endless tally,
I will burn the midnight hours still hungering your touch
never finished what we started probably never will.

desires locked in the throes of passionate thoughts,
we can not speak of it at all.

silence...

Oh hell,

Clenching sheets and tossing aches
Ive torn and twisted up every corner of this bed
made every scenerio of it ending in my head
nothing holds up to the great expectation
a pregnant endless pause...

will this night ever end?

all this time, you were just a phantom I assigned

to your face...

to your hard shape and soft eyes.

a phantasm

a love imprinted on your soma by my soul

so desperately wanting to see yours.

and here I am, calling you to me again

with no right after a thousand revelations

and every suffered revocation

youd think I'd learn why you disappeared?

but you will never be gone from me

I can sense these things.

my eidolon's soul fits you perfectly

Youre my perfect idea of beauty

all your crookedness and pain

every hunger in your eyes

every burn in your touch

the redemption you belive you will find in my destruction

to hell with the truth.

Im in love with your lovely brand of pain

the phantom of your ***

the soul of your love lies too well with you for me

I am convinced.

My vision of who I insist you are is all I need.

a breath on the wind and that look in your eyes,

still; all this time, a phantom i assigned.

a blueprint so well laid, in my heart and soul

I still believe you should be mine.

Too much space,
I grab the air around me trying to draw it in
But I've cleaned you out like a ***** sin.

Never knew how warm and comfortable the ugly side of love is
Touching the untouchable, to kiss the impossible kiss

I guess I thought pushing you out would leave me feeling like saint
Theres not a colour in my soul I haven't used in our love's hidden paint
The richest and darkest darks hiding lightest brightest sparks

I'm desperate for your connection, that indefinable thing
The pleasure of pain, nestled under broken wings

The crackling electric static hunting our souls to beat life into our hearts
We live in a life not made for us. Instead crossed with many other beautiful paths.

The patterns we've woven in our times apart all needing threading and tending. No end, no new start. Just empty spaces waiting to be filled in our hearts.

And though I gasp like a fish out of water for your breath,
I know the trails of our patterns cross paths and that our threads play off eachother, shining brighter and bolder than any other kind

But now I pay my pennance waiting for the next day, when we find our way and I can breath life in again.

Immaculate dreams float through my mindscapes
eyes of liquid love washing over me
Strong arms embrace me just to let me go
you fade in and out like a welcomed stranger
you find my heart strings
and gently pluck most beautiful songs of love out of me
A sideways glance captures your full manhood ready and wanting
And as I turn, you no sooner dissolve into thin air!

An intangible love...

your thought prints lay all over my body;
my soul wraps itself around yours
only to twist myself into nothing.
ever dependent on these dreamy whisps
of visitations upon my request
my lovely ghost
A thought  here,
a whisper there;
where are you dearest?
Please come to me,
I ache so much to
love you now.

Ephemerally yours,
a love that died a thousand deaths.

.
I aint that kinda rhyme girl you thought
I can follow structures and  that but I just feel caught
stuck on a hook like a butchered chook,
never worth a care or even a look,
so I like to break free from the things that constrain me
free flow and verse should never be terse
let the turgid waters of my mind flow where it will
and I promise I'll write things funny still
like rants and raves and in your faces
and soulful stuff like soulmates and graces
now I pick my keys carefully too so don't think I don't because I do.
but the thing is knowing when to rhyme like its cool
I don't do that cause I aint no fool
when its good its good whether its gotten or misunderstood
you'll feel it those vibrations, feel it, feel it those good vibrations, that's a bit funky I know I might have missed the mark but don't get your knickers in a bunch! but that's how I roll that's my whole goal the rhyming trick gets old but Im happy to resurrect it on demand to cheer up a poor soul!
hugSS and LOL! ;D

He drew designs of passion on my naked flesh with his fingertips

the rythym slow and winding delicately, pensively around the tightly wound delicate-est parts of me.

It was as if he were tracing every line, every beauty every imperfection that was my essence in physicality, and on occasion he looked deep into my eyes for further permissions to which I could not answer held hostage by his touch and my indelicate wanting.



The bottom of my lip curled up in a tooth nip constrained the torrernt of love words that threatened to pour from my mouth, breath doing its best to find regulation and all I wanted was to be lost in His adoring admiration floating anywhere in his abyss contented just to stare at his unorthodox beauty, fashioned by his strength and decisiveness and above all the way his soul knew mine.



It was a separation unbearable made more so, by the powerful burning longing ignited by his feathery touch. caught somewhere between sweet Nirvana and torturous Hades;  not sure which toe was dipped in which?  These were fleeting thoughts that brought me through my confusion and closer to the clarity of madness. Eyes now intent on discovering him, devouing him with each twist and turn of his strong limbs. my fingertips begining to free themselves from thier trance, reach hesitantly when finally touched its destination a gasping pleasure realsed its self from his throat as i slowly realise my touch equally burning my own design trails of longing fire. He threatened to lose control of, breathing love and fire passion as the lines of desire's designs brought fourth an achictectural beauty that ochestrated prisimic baptismal fire that no other could have pervaded;  and the words written in the burning flesh had no name just symbols, traced over and over again still not enough to capture meaning. It was all we had but it was enough to sign our love endless to the ages of ages.



some say there is a word that comes so close though many more words are missing, forgotten but still felt penultimate erotismiagapea the unity of all things designed to be craved by love.

You were everything I ever wanted and more

but nothing I needed.



i was so adamant I was right in your arms

but it never felt comfortable.



you were so complicated andfascinating

but the process was too simple



you invaded all my spaces i was full to bursting

but still empty inside.



You got nothing I need

and every thing I want



i want you so much

but not enough

to need you back in my life.

Folder: Humanity
I saw them beating you and I could do nothing.

I could not watch anyfurther

you could not scream they would not let you

they would not stop untill you did

I felt sooooo guilty.

I had done nothing for any of you.

i didnt even speak out

I carry your scream with me

I met you on Facebook.

tortured blackened and brused and still they hurt you

still they beat you on the cold floor with boy shorts

evil. evil. evil.

I cry for you

I bleed tears for you

you are my son as much as my own

the terror of your heart

the pain in your soul

the breaking of your body

wont leave me.

I couldnt even share it.

I am a coward.

Evil is as evil does.

blood shed and pain are no Godly ways

Sin is Sin.

I love you for your pain young boy not looking of even 16

I hurt for you

and I loved you the moment I saw your hopless bravery

I know nothing of the other pain only what was shown

I thank you beautiful boy who suffered and suffer and the hands of evil men

You dearest young man have brought me closer to my God

my lovely lamb if I could hold you take it all for you

if I had the courage to do more than see the hopelessness through these tears

dear sweet boy you have saved my soul

may the lord save yours

Dear God,

Please...

you know I will honour you to the end.

whether you show me you care or you dont.

I have faith in it.

I rest the corners of my mind on it.

I bleed real tears from my deepest soul.

I call for your comfort.

it may not come at all, but mine is here to rest your weary head

a soft lap and warm shoulder.

I will not abandon you though I may be silenced

my nothingness is not without love.

even when there are no words...

Piercing molten holes through garded hearts

The causality of your fancies rip through innocence with effortless charm.

Another pair of ******* drop to the floor

Another set of mounds

aching pinnacles begging

for the breath of a touch.

Sharp eyes survey endless pain,

but you don't want to heal

You want your name screamed in vain.

I'm good now and I'll be ******

If I let you in again

The flicker was enough

I know  you saw it

Walking on by as if it didn't mean a thing

And each time I ******* over

I know you'll hope I'll  steal away to cry

******* and those graceless eyes,

You played games

You told lies

You crush beauty

Like flies

Didn't we almost have it all?

Shouldn't of asked to see my love in measures of pain.

You played my crazy for sane

You shouldn't have said you loved me

When all I wanted was a ****,

I die again and again in those eyes

Each time in vain.

I find my self oscillating between chasms and  crevices in the distance between us
Luck never seems to be on my side
Slippage is a constant
Loose ground
Shaky legs
Crushed ice
Tight chest
breathless
No way out
Love's funny like that.

The stars have fallen,
The night's a shroud over dark velvet seas
Blackened and soulless.
The sky has fallen,
the moon refused to rise.
Poignant.

The crest has fallen weary
The rage of Poseidon's realm
Thunders in the thick charcoal air
******* in disdain and pouring fury out
Crashing
Pain, pain, pain.

The invisible sand rushes, grabs and pulls
Sinking, pulling hope into the pits of despair
Rushing backwards dizzily, swallowing deeper and deeper
Lost eyes in an unlit void screaming brightly
Blinding
Lies, lies, lies.

A fury so black.
A sadness so dark.
A love lost forever
the moment it was spoken
The stars fell out of the sky.

The hunger of you pervades my soul
like a fire needing more air

Such a dark and desolate scape
With out your warming fire.

The stars do their best
to capture the twinkle
lost in my eyes.

Riding the night sky
They fall at my feet,
A blanket of stardust!
and yet, I feel nothing,
though I still try.


The loss of you and
the light in your eyes*
Has made my bones dry.
The marrow of my soul
Out of reach
like the endless sky...

The spark of your presence
is lacking.
Oh so desperately lacking...

All the memories since creation
do nothing but plant me further
Into the depths of despair!

No star will ever twinkle
as bright as your eyes in mine.
Only Venus comes close;
But mars ever glows with warning;

as fate conspires
to keeps us apart.

Far away eyes cast their gaze upon ever rearranging light pins
Fragile connections vibrate amongst a rare and delicate frequency
The atmosphere lightens and sprawls across a mindscape
and darkens just as quickly when the mood beckons
Hanging in the in the air of possibilities I miss your company
Your wise to my closed eyes
My warm heart to your raging calm
My serendipitous words across your concise beauty
I kiss you hello on the wind aiming for your right cheek
The side you let me ride shotgun
But as always
I visit the spaces you leave behind
Not sure if you even care about glancing at the pinholes of patterns I leave behind
I cry a crystallized tear
and put it in a box labeled dearest b.
Hugss always.

fate whispers in winds
hopes fail in fait accompli
whispers fade to blank

1, 2, 3, 4, 5;
Once I brought a rhyme to life!
6, 7, 8, 9, 10
Then I let it die again.
Why did you let it die?
Because it brought a tear to my eye!
In Which eye did it make you cry?
See This little little tear drop on my right.

Tweaking, tweaking little rhyme
How I wonder what this time
Round and round in my mind
Wondering where on earth I'll find
How to tweak this little rhyme
Tweaking, Tweaking little rhyme.

Bah bah bad sign
For a little rhyme
Yeah sure yeah sure
Find a better line
One for the master
And one for a dime
And one for the amateur
Still thinking of a line!

There was a little poet
who had a little rhyme
He wrote in little lines
He worked in little time
And always did more
than little every time

the light flickers

the candle plays tricks for me

a warm ambient glow,

its life, simply there for my entrancement.

if only you were the flame of this candle.

then I could watch you dance and play sensously

instead of watching shadows

make shapes reminicent of you,

flicker on the wall,

wishing you close,

feeling your warmth.

oh forever torn and woven back together,
I don't understand the colours of my love
the way they fall and mesh together
the twines twisting and forming buckles and knots
the longing of loving.
the cool practical concern turning my dress into a tunic
the hot fiery passion ripping the fabric from modesty
the warm wool of comfort
the sparse cotton of carelessness
I don't have a shred of love more than I need
or any idea why,
what's woven by one love,
is worn by the other.