In an open field somewhere in the east
Where everything seemed at peace.
That feeling was like no other, with my thoughts and nothing else
As I looked down at the white petals I thought I’d lost myself
I started heaving and my vision blurred
I saw only the yellow centres, my perception stirred
I couldn’t take it anymore
So I walked until the tears started to pour
Until I hit a place where I was alone
Then, I decided for the next few minutes, it would be my home.
I started exploding
The Galaxies in my head began imploding
And soon I was floating
My tears turned to rivers that fed the seeds
Of the yellow centred white leaves.
They grew larger and larger
Until I could feel my mind's departure
Like alice in wonderland falling down the rabbit whole
And all at once I felt whole
I was able to do all the things I felt I’d missed out on ;
I went back to a time when I wasn't so sad
When I hardly ever got mad.
I saw my friends and didn’t have to try so hard
I saw my dad, we were playing in the backyard
I didn’t worry about being anyone else
My grades and my body didn’t need so much help
All of a sudden the love of my life was there too, back when he was chubby and I was still 5 foot 2.
And finally I felt like I could breathe
Like the clock stopped ticking and I didn't have to rush or leave
I no longer felt like every day was wasting away
And no longer wished I could run away
I felt like it could be solved another day.
And my crying didn’t stop for minutes
It was the most uncontrollable feeling, there were no limits
But soon the petals started to shrivel and the yellow centers became brittle
And I knew it was time to go.
That little girl, I'd never get back
I knew it was time to, once again, face a reality of black
Short lived was my travel back into time
But even that minute could be the happiest of my life.
Funny how my saddest moment brought me the most joy
Maybe that’s what it takes for someone broken to enjoy
This was the best way I came up with to explain one of the most emotional days of my life.