I don’t know why I don’t love you like I used to.

Time has passed and I feel less and less strongly.

And you say you haven’t changed

But maybe that’s the problem.

I feel like I’ve changed,

I’m not exactly sure who I am right now,

Not that I’ve ever felt very sure.

I feel like I don’t know anything.

This no longer feels exciting.

I no longer feel like you’re helping me grow,

I no longer feel like you’re part of what helps me

Be me.

I feel like I’m shedding this skin,

And you’re still wearing the one you were nine months ago.

It feels rough to my new skin,

Makes me itch,

Makes me restless.


I don’t know why I don’t love you like I used to.

Maybe I’m not the same me I used to be.


I’m looking ahead,

And you’re still looking at me.

i refuse to keep blaming you for what happened between us.

you tried your best to keep me happy and you always made sure i fell asleep before you. sometimes i lied about that because you'd post things that scared me and i needed to make sure you were okay. i guess i wasn't the only one who lied.

baby, do you remember that night in december when you told me you wanted to **** yourself and i found you by the railroad tracks? do you remember seeing my body next to yours? do you remember when i wouldn't let you go home because i couldn't watch you? my best friend slept over that night also because she didn't want me to worry about you even though you were right next to me.

maybe we both tried too hard, maybe we lied a little too much and maybe we shouldn't have even tried in the first place. sometimes i wonder what my life would've been if i hadn't met you. we hurt each other. you sent me pictures of blood dripping down your arm and it hurt me to the point where i had to sleep in my mom's room to ensure that i wouldn't hurt myself. you caused an aching in my heart and body that i've never experienced before and if there's a god up there, i pray that nobody hurts me and causes me as much pain as you did. you wrecked me. but i demolished you and walked around like i did nothing. it's been 7 months since we ended and i refuse to blame you for everything.

i remember the night when i took a few pills and you took your dad's car all the way across town to take me to a hospital. sometimes i wish i didn't tell you and others i wish i didn't take the pills. i think after that i realized that you were one of the most addictive drugs out there and i was hooked from the second we met.

i hope you realize i don't hate you anymore. i hope you realize that i take responsibility for what i did. it wasn't all your fault. i'm sorry. i miss you.

How's it like for you
To not think about me anymore?
Cause I think of you constantly.

How's it like for you
To not have me there anymore?
Cause I can't stand being away from you

How's it like for you
To not miss me at all?
Cause missing you is tearing me in two

I'm not the same as I was before
But I know what I was like with you

I was happy, scared, sad
Confused, cheerful, mad

Now, I don’t feel anything

I smoke too much
But that's because I want to get rid of
The taste that you left in my mouth