1) you know you left your favorite pair of underwear at my house, do you want to come and get them?
2) i miss you more than I miss my home
3) you're like a part of me that left and I really want that part of me back
4) you use to call me beautiful, I looked at myself in the mirror, said those words, cried softly because it wasn't your voice
5) i miss your voice running through my skin
6) remember all those times you would call me and tell me you miss me? How come you don't do that anymore?
7) i hugged this tall boy and it reminded me of how you would slouch to hug me, I smiled so widely I was as happy as I was when I was with you
8) the boy next to me smells like you
9) my brother came home and your name slipped out of his mouth or it sure seemed like
10) i miss you.
11) i saw you staring at me and when I went to smile you turned away
12) it got me sad like how when you told me you didn't like me
13) remember that time you kissed me? And you said you hope it doesn't change anything? You lied
14) it's been almost 4 months and my lips still ache your touch
15) i wish you were here
16) we were never in love but oh boy, how we could have been

j.f

I'm tired
Tired of trying
Of being the nice girl
Of everyone calling me a sweetheart
Tired of always being the second choice
Of constantly having my life fall apart
Of having no one write me love poems
Tired of having nothing
Of never getting what I want
Of being so lonely
Of never getting what I deserve
Tired of feeling so **** sad
Of never getting the chance to be happy
Of thinking back to that knife
I'm so tired of being tired
I'm just tired of life



I don't wanna be tried
I thought you'd help me finally sleep
Now, my tiredness causes nightmares
And I've given up my chance at my dream

I'm  getting there. I'm getting to my happy place again. You're still always on my mind, but it's beginning to hurt less. It doesn't feel like there's a gaping hole in me, my chest, my life. It doesn't feel as bad as it used to you anymore when someone brings you up, when something reminds me of you or when I have to go to sleep without you by my side. Life is beginning to go back to the way it was before you ****** around with it .  It's finally as if you were always a distant memory. Soon you'll fade completely. I won't be constantly wagering the "what if's" and "whys" for they will no longer matter. I will simply be focused on the present, for it is a gift I have yet to open .

Please don't leave me
lying in the dirt
giving me nothing to do
but wallow and hurt.

please don't leave me
to stitch my own wounds
leaving my body
to be consumed.

Please don't leave me
to be all alone
and let my mind become
a giant cyclone.

Please don't leave me
to fight my battles without you
because I'm not sure
I can even get through.

so please don't leave.

i loved you
and i love you still.
you never did,
you never will.