I wonder if anyone listens,
but it doesn't really matter.

I called you at 2am
because i missed the way
your voice crackled
in the static
even at an unreachable distance.
I lay here,
eyes shut.
imagining countless scenarios
of how I might see you again.
however,
you look so much better in my mind.
and online.


c.m.
8-19-14

Why didn't I stay
Why did I leave you there
Why am I such a fool

Why, why, why
why am I this way
Why, why, why

Who will love me
Who will stay by my side
Who will be there when I need them most

Who, who, who
Who am I
Who, who, who

What is it that I'm looking for
What is it I see in the world
What can I do

What, what, what
What do you want from me
What, what, what

Tell me what you need
Tell me what you want
Tell me what you see

Tell me, tell me, tell me
Tell me who I should be
Tell me, tell me, tell me

Where do I need to go
Where did I lose you
Where can I find your love

Where, where, where
Where can I find you
Where, where, where

I find these questions
I can't answer them
Does anyone hear me
Can anybody help me

Who will love me
who will stay by my side
who will be there when I need them most

Sometimes I want to scream
"leave me, everyone does" I'd say
"stop toying with my life"

Sometimes I wonder
'I love unconditionally
what if I never loved at all'

If I had no heart
there'd be no ache
but there'd be a lost and angry soul

Life is misery
love is pain
but my life is a huge joke

I used to believe in many things
like love and mythical fairytales
but that did not last

I grew up looking for good
I knew since I was little
life is not sugar plums and gum drops

I knew the world was made of evil
I saw it all
before I even started middle school

I try to dry the tears
I try to bottle up the pain
but it just wears on me

I could hide my heart
It always beat so sorrowfully
it was always so steady

May you see life
may it be enlightening
may you learn from what you see

I learned to be true to myself
I learned to deal with some pain
I learned life is cruel

Love is a sensitive thing
love can hurt
but love can also feel good

When you find true love
you'll want to dance and sing
just be careful where you step

Things aren't always what they seem
they might look nice
don't base life on looks

I saw life
I saw death
doesn't mean I know them truly