What lies within this man
is apparently gold,
at times, for others
But toxic thoughts keep him
from daring to enjoy anything
Please, someone distract him
before his life has fled
and he finds his false beliefs
were of the worst kind there is
when he could have had others
just as false,
but not suffered without end

After I make my way home
I have that feeling:
I don't want to go out anymore
Can't I just stay here like this?
Why does the weekend
Always come again
And draw me in
With its promises?

What if I fell
in love with you,
and you lost what's
left of your hearing,
and you couldn't
hear me say
I love you
anymore?

I want to get so high
And listen to each other's music
And as one of us cries,
The other one joins

We see;
We feel;

This is everything that's real

Every time we talk,
I'm falling further for you
Every time you're around,
I'm wanting you closer to me
And every time I share this truth,
You recoil and step further away

If you don't want to message me back,
that's fine
If you want to talk a bit and stop replying,
that's fine
If you want to talk for hours on end,
that's fine
If you want to see my poems before we meet,
that's fine
If you don't think I'm cute,
that's fine
If you only want me to be your best friend,
that's fine

Just because I know what I want
and I know I'm not going to get it
doesn't mean you can't get yours

When I find another girl
How will I explain
The love poems I wrote you
When I have none to give to her

Please tell me,
Why is it that I'm such an unhealthy person?
I didn't have that bad of a childhood
Not bad at all, really. Pretty good, if anything.
Minimal trauma.
Imperfect, but loving parents.
Is it my brain chemistry?
Genetics?
I don't get it.

Well, I can't answer that question.
Reason being I haven't been there all along
You see, I'd have to know exactly who you were when you were born
And then I'd have to know how your mother held you
How your father disciplined you
What your sister said to you when you'd annoy her
And I'd have to have been there for it all
Every moment
Because each moment shaped you
And even then, I couldn't see just what imprint each experience left
Because I am not inside you
I would have a lot of clues
And I could ask questions for more
But there is no knowing it all
Because you are you because of everything

I've got nothing to say to you.
Except everything
that's on my mind
              every day

When I write about love,
I'm writing about you
Remembering your presence
And the things you would do

I threw away your picture,
Quit talking to you
But you live on within me
No matter what I do

I play games in my mind,
Wonder if I could have you
But I think I'm just crazy
And sad to see, too

Know how I search every day
on sites for meeting matches
and I never find anyone
I really want to meet
or really want to be with
That's because I'm still
searching for you
And what can I say
except I'm a fool

Words I write as I cry
are occasionally found
to be beautiful
Words I speak
and actions I take
are often ignored
If my written word
finds its way
into your heart,
Perhaps this
Is the greatest love
I'll never know