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beauty marks and
kisses from angels
dots on white
checked every year

they made my mom sick
they burned them
cut them
froze them
they cover her more than me
like sprinkles
little moments in time
spread over her body
my fingers would trail them
feel the way they changed her skin
I loved her dark spots
until I realized they did not love her

I've grown
my skin has stretched mine
pulled my dark spots apart from where they started

If I could show you just how much I've changed
I would show you with my dark spots
I would show you how they started here
and moved
and changed
and grew
I would tell you how one dark spot has tracked my growth
it never expected to be pulled down with the years
but my growth prevailed and there it lies
miles away from it's home

I would show you the one that I touch when I am nervous
but not a bad nervous
the nervous that excites
that entices
that knows there is more to find
an adventure abroad
your love to steal
I touched this dark spot when I first saw you
I still run my finger over it
every time we meet  

I would show you the scar
where one was cut out
where my kiss from an angel
was suspected to be a kiss from cruel fate
where my Mother's sickness
shined through me
where I felt mortality for the first time
I lost my first tooth that summer day
hours before they took my first dark spot
it was as if my body knew it was time to grow up
now that I had thought of death
there was no point for baby teeth
their assessments were wrong
my dark spot was an angel's kiss
but the risk was too great
a lighter body and an aged mind moved forward
my kiss gone
my blessings gone as well

I would show you the ones that come every year
that lightly dust my nose
I would run your finger over the skin
to show you that they are as fleeting as the season
that they pop up as fast as they leave
just like you did
you left with those dark spots

I would show you the ones that make me who I am
make me who we are
the triangle on my left arm
the triangle that all the women in my family share
the women that are the strongest I know
that have their own dark spots
their own stories
such a vast valley between our lives
joined by our love
by our past
by our dark spots
all in the same shape

I would show you my fourth dark spot
I would show you the thing that I am most proud and humiliated of
the fact that I am not wholly one of them
the fact that I am my own

I would ask you to flip me over
to run your hand across my back
to clutch my ribs
to touch the dark spots I cannot see
to give you the dark spots that are for you
I would show you the dark spots that are for you when I walk away
when I lay next to you
under you
in front of you

if I could show you how much I've changed
I would show you my dark spots
the ones that belong to you
the ones that belong to the angels
the ones that belong to the cruel fate
the ones that are from my mother
I would show you the ones that bind me to the women in my family
but most of all
I would show you the ones that are just mine
that only I know
I want you to know them too

I want you to know my dark spots
 Feb 2013 Simon G Tehle
Homer
XI. TO ATHENA (5 lines)

(ll. 1-4) Of Pallas Athene, guardian of the city, I begin to
sing.  Dread is she, and with Ares she loves deeds of war, the
sack of cities and the shouting and the battle.  It is she who
saves the people as they go out to war and come back.

(l. 5) Hail, goddess, and give us good fortune with happiness!
When my ******* lofty
Thoughts inspire
Me to hate the God who
Loves me, cursing,
Spitting, trampling on the
Savior, I
Consider whether god is
Just a product
Made by Suffering—*******
Chinese finger
Trap of suffering—creatures
Hating creation,
Or a dual-natured
Being, but in
Stead of order versus
Chaos, He is
Chaos versus chaos.
A personal favorite. I just got the crazy idea to try something trochaic.
With the heart worn like an
old man's shoe
With the wind a last friend
of my second hand jacket
all blown and frail

I continue
to denounce the golden streets of disguised power
to trounce on hidden cops
to pounce on everything rotten in Denmark
to reek and to rage
like a rusting zoo cage
an overturned ****
a pensive white button
withering in my brain
a push cart filled with
burning accusations
I remain
street bound weary

I'm that secret little hope
gnawing at the nape
of your neck

Note: Re-written in Sofia, Bulgaria on the 14th of July 2012 after once again (after so many countless times) being followed and harassed even in front of my own house...I guess it's nice to know that some people read poetry very very attentively ;--))
 Feb 2013 Simon G Tehle
V
There are those who have a place,
And those who lost one.
Those who change the world,
And those who are never known by it.
The seen and unseen.
This girl is average.
Like every other.
Manufactured in a child labored factory,
Under horrifying conditions.
Yet she makes the cut, as imperfect as she is.
to live in this imperfect world,
Obsessed with perfection.
Twisted into believing that it is.
Has not enough beauty marks,
And to many zits to pop.
Focuses on high maintenance,
Forgets the festering wound.
Not quite a reject she is.
The bi-product of searching for that ONE with IT.
****** into a fast paced life with a slight limp, and a stuttered lisp.
Unable to catch up.
Yet she hears, and sees,
And knows.
"I was created to fill a space, and yet I have no place."
A clone of every other,
Same microchipped thoughts.
Walking aimlessly on a planet with no room.
Purpose for the purposeless,
Eat or be eaten.
But you can not eat without utensils,
And you weren't packaged with these necessities.
To feed with your hands is primal,
And not accepted.
Live this life until you die,
Unknown and alone.
We all walk the same stories,
Each thinking we are our own.
Some separate, and find a way,
Never looking back.
But for those of us who walk with that limp,
We will never get it fixed.
And in this fast paced "perfect" world,
Where we can't catch up,
We will never find our way.
Live unknown to die alone.
But alas it is our mindset that makes the difference
Is it not?
The challenge is re-coding what we were made into.
Loving ourselves, and fighting for the imperfect world.
Instead of accepting the roles given by society.
That's when we will become someone different.
But it's not easy.
It rarely ever is.
A day ends as it began

Dark, cold....filled to the brim with the unknown

Like wisdom, she calls out

she knows my name

searching for something worth devouring.

Her gaze cannot be met

calmly she speaks sweetly

to the foolish so neatly until discreetly

her appetite is wet

A bright sun drowns out her cries

But she will return

She always comes back

in vain we prepare for her attack

Though her gaze sends trembling down my spine

her presence brings rest for my eyes

awakening my mind to fears

only dreamed about.

Hello Nyx

I can't play tonight

for I pray tonight

soon it will be bright

and for a short period of time

you return to Styx

at least for now....
Copyright of Nigel Elvis Leo Ruiz.
 Feb 2013 Simon G Tehle
Zoe Mize
You led me by the hand into deep waters,

dark and tempering,

and with your every simple word,
I found myself not breathing,

until, wrist straining against my writhing,
you dragged me back to air.

And shaking, goose bumps rising, 

I cried for you,

and for the water, which had hugged me

and tried so fiercely to pull me back in.
 Feb 2013 Simon G Tehle
Jose Diaz
I walk with loneliness, she is my best and only friend
has long hours to talk, is good to treat
she has a silent voice almost like the wind soft,
she sleeps in my bed, and she uses to pose for my paintings ...

she understands my absurdities, we play the lonely
I do not know if I should say it but sometimes I fear her
she feels so cold that breaks my mirror
and she's so weird that sometimes I get sick

she's waiting I find a love
maybe that day she say "good bye"
perhaps in a while I get another star
but meanwhile I walk with her ...
I will sail into the night
With neither a guide or a light

The horizon calls my name
And i obey  

I am so very far away
my ship left in a haze

The worn out floorboards start to creak and splinter
Not able to handle the ferocity of the ocean anymore  

My ship starts to sink into the murky depths below
And i find that i cannot swim
So i give in
And drown in my own insanity
Slithering above
But gurgling below
Behind evil
Remember me
Between disgust & never
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