I am not gonna write how it is
to lose. A friend. Again
It's the physical closeness
That we miss
I miss to hold your hand.

I am not gonna write how sad
I felt, when I said goodbye.
Because these thoughts and feelings are able
to make me emotional and cry.

I am not gonna describe
How I lost something together with you
As if I was separated in two
And you took one part of myself with you.



... and still I do.

Done blaming myself
Want to give myself love
That I deserve

Been fake
And treating badly myself
For far too long

Done being harsh with myself
I wanna grow
Although accepting myself
For who I am

I see the light in my eyes
I just woke up
Now I again recognize
My love and soul

I wanna give me the strength
I'm gonna need
I will be there for myself
From now on
Again

I won't be afraid
Of losing myself
Because
I'm here

I stop crusading myself,
I am still here

I see the light
In my eyes
It makes believe
I see the sun
And the moon
And I can breath

<3

Precious time
Great ideas
I am using these

I don't want
To lose them
Make them useless

Automatically
Planning out
Creativity
Is the ground

No illusions
Can be found
No strategic
Or deep wounds

Truth is happiness
With no fear
And creations are
Its best friends

Beautiful
Nice to hear
This is how this short poem
Ends

What would death feel like?
Strong and mighty...
Like a fight?
Neutral ignorant
Maybe
Or just fearful
Not to be

Would it maybe
Rather be
Happy and relaxed
Or isn't it for us
To see how long it lasts?

Is there something like pre-death
Just to put us to the test
To see the reaction beneath
To examine if we are ready

It is possible
That death is a new start
Some do believe in it
It's not too hard
But tough
Is to assume
That nothing will follow
Nor time nor space no room
All in one swallowed

And I think to myself
If that's what death is like
Do we even have to worry
To die in a certain glory
Or too young or too soon
Because if nothing follows
Then the you disappears
In a moment with all fears
And if you don't feel
You are not alive
So death might be less crucial
Than we're used to assume
Our attitudes, opinions will be gone
Our feelings all disappear on their own
And with them our very own soul
Which might continue its adventure
In a different creature.