if you take advantage
of someone's weaknesses

that is
n o t
love

i loved you so much, i didn’t realize i had forgotten what it felt to love myself.

First love,
And quite possibly,
The only one I’ll ever let myself know.

I hate that I care so much
I hate how much you affect my day
How when you text me I feel alive
but when you are ignoring me the next day I die a little bit inside

Why would you paint such a beautiful  picture in my head
When you know you can't love me back
Your thoughts are still going to a different girl but mine keep holding onto you
How do I do this? We are both hurting but for different lovers

I wish we could work
I wish you would realize that I would give you my world but no you don't care as much as I do I am just a rebound for all you knew
And you know what I hate the most?
I hate that after all you put me through I am still in love with you

Your naked body
Pressed on mine
We kissed

I thought that
I should feel
Something

Thrill, euphoria
Lust, love
Or bliss

But no
I felt
Nothing

when I die

turn my body into ashes

and

spread it over the ocean

so I can go home

after a lifetime of feeling

homesick