I told her how could heaven survive without her..
For she was that moment
When the sky is blue and the Sun peeks through the clouds..
Beautiful...
I told her that angels must envy her smile
because all they have are wings...
but your smile causes men to flight...
I said to her...
Comfort
You will find comfort in my arms...
Love in my heart
and wisdom in my thoughts...
And I sung
Sweet Gloria
Sweet Sunrise in my night time...
Sweet moonlight in my darkness...
Sweetness in your kiss
You shine....
I told her I'd do better
I promised with a kiss
I sealed her with my sweet song
that went just like this

Sweet Gloria
Sweet Sunrise in my night time
Sweet moonlight in my darkness
Sweetness when I kiss
You shine.....

I've been scared for a while.
Been counting down the days.
Three is still unlucky.

What if what happened was it?
The cause.
It changed something.
It seems like everything I say
Changes something.

I'm sorry.
I tried not to worry,
But I broke.
These thoughts are allspillingout
andIdon'tknowwhattodoand...
I just need to breathe.

Twelve days before the Third.
And I ******* up.
I don't know if that seemed
Like an argument,
But it scared me.





Dear Diary,
            Its been a while since I wrote to you. Its hard because you never reply... Even when I ask for advice. Putting that aside, I just need to know... Why is it always Three? I need that to change. I finally feel stable, and if Three takes that from me... I'll be lost. I know I might cause it this time, but even so, please please please keep Three at bay.

                                                                                                  Wish you well, please respond just this once.
                                                                                                                  *~Kestrel~

I measured time in heartbeats and length
by how far your fingers traced on my skin.
Time passed like sultry summer nights
and length was as far as the night stars
that kept us company.
Every second was one I tried to keep safe
instead of cherish.
I wish you’d still wrap your hands around mine
as tight as you do your morning tea.
Because you are my pulmonary veins,
carrying all the broken parts I give and
returning them alive.
Reviving blood as dense as lead,
warming it like the sunrise I used to feel you in.
But now I can only battle eyelids that drop
like anchors near shallow shores;
trying to find the footing your eyes once gave
(still give).
And you might call me a liar,
but it felt like forever to me.
I still measure time in heartbeats
but length by how far
you feel from me.
And right now time moves
as quick as early mornings,
and length is farther than I’d like.

she used to be okay.
always a smile on her face and
she talked with a sweet voice,
which is something i don't want to under state,
and she never really cared that she was
40 pounds overweight.

but now as she lays on the beach
and no boys and no girls look her way
she feels invisible, even while she dreams of
being able to tell her parents that she
might be gay.

her parents talk about her figure
and how she'll never compare to how her
sister looked when she was her age.
thin, toned legs and a stomach with abs.
after all, who wants to date a girl
with flabs?

she has a blog dedicated to the thin girls
who make her feel so bad,
it makes her feel less,
it makes her feel sad.

if only she counted calories and
if only she could fit in that size two,
maybe she's be the perfect daughter that
her parents wish they knew.

but even as she drinks a sprite and
takes all her bites in spite she knows that
if she was skinny then
everything would be alright.

all she needs a push and a pro ana friend and
maybe she can be the perfect daughter
again. She can't like girls and she
must skip dinner, by the end of the year her
bones and boyfriend will
show that she is a winner.

-r.a.

My Love
My Heart
My Life
A love hindered is a love with potential.
A love where it is essential to realize that there lies a power within
Where in between there is a tension so thick and that quick our love can be over
My lover, my world, my moon, my sky, my star.
The sun in my sky afar.
Im giving you my all.
As my heart makes its call,
I realize that somewhere the love has fallen short
The beauty has turned dark
The warmth has turned cold
The embrace has turned bitter
A love hindered
A love that is hurting a laugh that is crying, slowly dying, but yet denying that it's losing it's power. It has lost its touch
It has lost itself
It has lost its wealth
Who is the hero of love?
Who can be the hero when the hero knows not what needs to be saved?
A constant dismissing
Of hugging and kissing
Bodies fail to meet
Faces fail to greet
Drawn from a broken heart lines flow
Drawn from a broken spirit lines flow
Drawn from a broken soul lines flow
This love. This love. This love.
It's lost. Gone. Gone. And gone again.
But suddenly breath like wind, takes us for a spin.
And again
Back to begin
Give me your hand
Give me your heart
Give me your body
Your taste, touch, temperature.
A love hindered
It's a love still there
A love that looks up at you as a lost child, waiting for repair.
A love hindered.

Pretty bare rib cage
Rabid butterflies pick
At flesh in rage.

My fire is out
The steamy shower burns
My hands they bleed
And blister red.

Stoic smile
Bloodshot eyes
Words slip past my lips as lies.

But I believe...
Oh yes the stories.
Tainted doves fly free, impurities.
You know it's a problem when all you have left is these tainted doves.