laughter all laughter cascading past mountain
caves, pushed aside for so long in lieu of the ocean
and now looked upon with fresh eyes and new time

you are not ready for this life

you are not ready but you step ahead, you
fall on the steps and catch your breath and
rise like an angel

stay where you should be, even
though we are technically free

I don't want to be.

Sick sick sick
eating poison pills that might
taste good if they were tangible

sometimes it's hopeless and
I can't help you until I
help myself.

It's darkest just before the dawn
but darling, you've been far too long from
these arms now that, left to one, grow
tired and fall limp like rags to sleep

come home and we'll make known
all the ways we both have grown
or just ring my phone, and
let me know you're there

Our world cannot stand still
when early morning silence only invites
remnants of thrashing nights to play
across lashes like dewdrops, a face like rain

I have witnesses similar shadows on the
moon, just as distant and untouchable, just
as hard to swallow in the fresh air, the
blank stare of post-understanding where we
don't try anymore

Our world cannot stand still.
     It's running itself raw.

Do you eat words like I do?
(Swallow them whole and kicking)

The clock says smile and
  rush along the clock
     says we should eat heavily and
        drink until the oceans shrivel into
           our cups like death as a
               fire tide

The clock says hurry now before I
   get away from you, turn off the road and

****
             no more time.

Is there anything
                           after
the fire simmers down, bed of red
      coals on the cold
                 dark ground all
              around when there's
        no sound and no space and
            no crystal tinkling laughter
   to climb your spine

                 or walk along a river spread
            beside a tired and tortured head
                        is there anything
                                             after?