There is a clock ticking on the wall.....
I hear every second, every minute, every hour as it ticks away.
I can hear it....but I cant see it.

There is an hourglass sitting on the table....
the sand pours through and I can see as every second,
every minute, every hour falls away.
I can see it, but I cannot hear it,
or taste, nor immediately feel it.

What is it that really defines time?
We break things down to milliseconds
but our brains do not have the capacity to really register it.

Yesterday, I stood in the rain
put my head to the sky and let the drops hit my face.
It only takes a millisecond for the drop to fall on my lips,
but it takes three times that for my brain to realize it.

My sister was born and then I blinked....
and she will be starting school this year.
I am scared to blink again, honestly.

I want so desperately to pretend it doesn't exist,
that the restraints of time are something we simply made up.

Then, I see my grandparents,
and the increase in the number of wrinkles on their faces,
and I know that the only thing that this could be blamed on is
....time.

I feel us...
Growing and shifting and changing...
and separating.
Becoming more and more different with each passing day.
When we first met things were not like this.

Sometimes it seems that day was just yesterday,
then we fight and I know we are drifting.
And I hate it!!

I wish I could go back...
in time.

My life, your life, their lives, are passing
Not enough done in a solitude day..
and we are all falling behind.
The last generation is dying out.
Our generation is growing up,
we are taking over and we are not prepared...

Yet, there is just no way
that we could ever stop *time.

The terrible truth is...
I love that I can run away!
That I can escape into this world...
Where everything is anything I want it to be.


Where you are just a figment of my imagination.
And, I can make you so much sweeter.
And there is no negativity,
no melancholy drama.

Here the animated beauty I see,
lies within everything, even you.
I can twist your evil words into a sweet sweet song ringing in my head.
The animosity in the room is not palpable,
and there is only a longing to dance in rhythm.

Oh I love this land of make believe!
Where just a word turns into a constant outflow.
Or a solitude thought of fantasy,
becomes an intriguing and engulfing page.

I love the traffic jam in my head,
just waiting to become permanent ink.
Words strung together never to be taken back,
to just linger in the world....
waiting for someone to cherish them.

To open eyes and minds....
To inspire and ignite imagination and individuality!
To provide an escape for you and them...
To provide a mental island for myself.

Inside my blissful hideaway..
Everything is so comfortable!
No rules to follow, no expectations to meet.
Complete freedom.*
Oh how I do love it here.....

Today seems a little different than all the rest. My senses feel heightened slightly, my head may split in two and my heart may be dancing right in my chest. There is not much sunshine out, but I am ready and motivated. While this may be normal for some for me I should still be in REM sleep right about now with the off chance I would be up if the sun were shining right in my window. I have this feeling that I have so much to learn. Like there is something I am wrong about or maybe just not quite right about. But that, however, is typical me.....thinking about things then over thinking about things until I have analyzed every situation from every angle and every possible option or method. It doesn't make since to me either....I just know I can suddenly smell all the beauty in this world right from my doorstep. Other peoples sentences and everyday phrases have different meaning today. Well, for this part of the day. Morning is always different from the rest of the day. Morning is slow and easy...time to drink coffee and listen to the birds friendly conversation, even when working morning is a time to collect yourself and the job. Assemble yourself or your work item so that for the rest of the day it or you will be running like a well oiled machine. As the day progresses, any parts of life become more hectic. The corporate people of the world are at the breaking point and somehow it seems to show only in road rage....By this time at work someone will have thrown a wrench into the machine I took care to assemble so meticulously this morning. By evening or nightfall the high pace of humanity has taken its toll on all of us, causing irritability and sloth. This is something some people come face to face with everyday, while others hide it away behind closed doors, which is fine with me because by now I am feeling the strain too and really don't feel like putting up with it from everyone else.....but we do. Thus, ending a cycle that has become all too common in our world. But this day if different. This day the birds will sing until two and lunch hours will be filled with laughter and smiles. People will go home and be kind to their mates and discuss not a single detail of their typical work day. Instead they will enjoy a nice dinner in the yard with the children their love created dancing along to the music our world creates if you stop and listen.....the family dog will lie faithfully on the porch and the cat will not tease. If allowed this will be different than ever before. You may even smell a rose today. I saw something in you, and I know what I saw. It was blindingly bright, but caught such a hold on me that I cannot wriggle away from it's grasp. I have a love that some people search for their whole lives. Some people find it and let it slip away as I have before...That love was reflected to me through you, and in you.

Deep inside-
If you allow yourself to connect to the earth...
you can reveal in you,
the Mayan,
the Aztec,
the Egyptian,
the Native American,
or whatever background you may have...

It lies within *all of us.
And, if you listen to the call
you can unlock yourself.
Your true spirit.
The reincarnation of those before you.
We all possess the ability,
the talent. the spirituality...
We just don't all know how to channel it.

It lies just beneath the flesh.
Underneath all the dirt,
all the scars,
all the trash...
Waiting for the awakening of your soul.
Waiting for you to hear.

If you are lost in the rat race.
If you are trying so desperately to find
happiness, riches, or love...
You tune out everything else.
You will never hear it...
You will never feel the itch,
only the struggle.

You will never know the bliss
of feeling your soul at complete rest,
at complete peace,
full of love...
Or hear the song of the birds,
or the waves,
or the wind.
Your mind will only reach as deep,
as they tell you it can go.
And you can only see what you want,
not what you have,
not what is all around you,
not what you have been so blind from
all this time.
When you hear the call you will see...

Beauty has nothing to do with the beholder,
its all about the perspective of the witness.
And if you are too busy chasing,
what they tell you is important...
You will never truly see.

I have reached that place within..
I feel my soul growing every day.
I get closer to this world,
to the Earth,
....to its aura....
I fall deeper in love.
With the same place that was around before.
But, now I have new eyes.
I have their eyes.
Not tarnished by greed,
arrogance, desire, condemnation!
I see with only purity....
**I have awakened!

Can you please use your telescope?
Look out into the universe and know I'm there..
It may take some zooming in and out,
But i am in the atmosphere.
Floating abundantly with the stars..
But i don't shine as bright.
Please look really hard...
About a half an hour past midnight-
There i will be,
Hovering just above the moon.
Sitting, waiting, wishing
That you will come and join me soon.
We can dance with Venus all day long..
Or just sit and watch the earth.
Slide down the rings of Jupiter..
Or wait for the sun's rebirth.
It's far too hot to visit mars..
But i think we could take Neptune.
For now I'll wait on mercury..
Sitting, waiting, wishing...
*That you will come join me soon.

Sometimes when my heart breaks you don't even care....
Just try to play it off and act like the victim..
I have no patience for this anymore.
If i was your priority i think i would know by now.....
But i am not.
There is so much more that i deserve.
I ******* hate you.