I've been having a war with my bathroom door
Cleaning my closet feels like a waste
When I have all this dirt on my face
I keep wearing my mind on my sleeve  
Look at the mess the brain matter started to leave
And the fiends only stopped knocking because
I never lock these gates anymore
All these thoughts mentally start to swirl
Stuck arguing with myself
Unravel my second being like Professor Quirrell
Now who's got the stone to make me melt?

They make work miserable, act unique they'll smash though
"Here's a black suit, black shoes, now that's you"
Act passionate and we'll laugh at you or stare
Until you have no personality to share at all
Now take a pat on the back and another task to attack
But we won't pay you any extra for any of that.

I'd rather melt with these snowflakes
Than be a powder keg of suppressed emotion
Snap my fingers in a quick motion
And blow up these baby boomers
Then assume I don't have my mind in check
While you drink through pain a wreck
I'm two hundred percent proof, you sit loose
About as real as hi-c implying it's juice
If my twenty year old body ******* this world
You made her a *****
And she was only looking for a better player to score

This is social poetry,
The words I let everyone read.
These letters won't cut very deep,
I could write them in calligraphy
Elegantly displaying for all to see.
Look how pretty they sit with me,
A pluffy little piece of parchment
That really said nothing, like a plaque
Purchased from a proper place
Wrapped with lace saying
"You miss all the shots you don't take"

This is social poetry.
The message falls short with time,
Generalizing emotion, pretending to be genuine.
Here's a five word statement, now base it
On life choices, calm the voices, noiseless.
No sir, we are not simple, basic, face it,
We want something real to read and feel
Like we exist in present eyes
And leave that one verse of Corinthians
That people love to quote to be crucified.

This is social poetry,
Where thoughts come to drift
A simple limerick when you need a lift
But when you want to know
About what makes the walls really tick,
I'll hand you my heart in pages to flip.

I'm the jewelery behind the cage
That nobody wants to buy
But catches your eye for a minute.
Shining because I was shined
Until within goes dark again,
They pull me out to be cleaned and grin
Then everyone goes home
But in the cages they leave the lights on
So while the rest sleep, my head still spins.

I'm the mismatched socks you don't wear,
Can't throw them out, so they stay there.
Piled under everything new to come
I've got a hole in my sole, threads undone.
You pull to stop the little bleed.
More and more string starts coming free.
Until I'm tangled and you're entangled in me.

I'm the poet that doesn't get read
But continues to write so he might go to bed

Some days

Some days I want to travel,
Have an exciting adventure
Unravel the globe real slow
And hold adrenaline in my palms.
Some days I wish i was something
More than this body dragging me around
More than the clothes setting a status
As the gravity keeps me on ground
Looking up to people who only look down.
Instead of the ones who pave paths
Regardless of anyone coming around.

Sometimes I lay on the floor
Mapping out my mind on the ceiling
Only to run out of ink and out the door
then the rain is still pouring in.
Sometimes I get lost in a game,
In a world quite unlike my own,
Where I play a hero and dragons are slain
All in the name of a throne.
Save the world only to remain.
Unknown.

Some days I wish I could be anything
Move mountains in a moment of time
With one arm I could swing
And make this whole world mine.
Seamlessly craft it and watch it with care
In the air, I could watch it be grown.
But some days, like today, I am tired
And would just like to go home.
Save my world and remain.
Unknown.

Some days i want to travel,
Have an exciting adventure
Unravel the globe real slow
And hold adrenaline in my palms.
Some days i wish i was something
More than this body dragging me around
More than the clothes setting a status
As the gravity keeps me on ground
Looking up to people who only look down.
Instead of the ones who pave paths
Regardless of anyone coming around.

Sometimes I lay on the floor
Mapping out my mind on the ceiling
Only to run out of ink and out the door
then the rain is still pouring in.

I'm just trying to be someone
That my past self would be proud to know

Here's a poem to the world,
You've been calling my name out loud
I'm ready to write you back now.
I'm ready to tell everything right now.
I'm sick of making excuses,
Wrapping my passion up in killer nooses
Pretending this job is more important
But it's just money and a nuisance.
I'll tie myself to these keys
Because I need myself to be abusive.

You gave me these skills to tell a story,
I'm on that fast track to beat it out
I don't want the fame or glory
But these veins need to bleed it out.
I never believed in my being
But the fire your seeing isn't going out like candles
If you've got a buck, sir, I'm not a gamble.

Crack the locks to a dream life
Where I sit looking at those stars each night.

There are times to be scared
In them, rational thoughts drift from your head
The times when news comes that appears unfair
And all the crazy, wild fills you instead.
I know it, you know it. I hate it.
Take a breath.
In an ocean of waves, some are meant to swim
With a storm on the horizen, the outlook is grim.
Take a breath and hold it. For a second and release.
You can make it, I can make it.
This is not how I die,
It's much more surprising for the life I've led.

You won't take me alive, sir.
To be clear, you won't take me at all
Look into my eyes, Storm.
See the walls I've made fall.
Don't come any closer, truly, I mean no harm.
But come at me, I'll attack thee.
Until my sanity is long lost,
Every bone I've been blessed, will shatter in just cost.
Take a breath. Take a second.
Think hard about your moves, you hold such might
But I hold a will with everything to lose.

There are times to be scared
When my hands shake without end
Truthfully, I do my best to hide it
Try as I might to hold it in.
I take a breath.
With water just below my mouth
I've been submerged deep in water
And turned that downpour to a drought.
I don't want to, you can make me.
Because, although, I'm scared of the sea
Make no mistake, I will make the sea fear me.

You can watch the world tick,
You can watch the sun tock.
Spinning to infinity, trapped on a big clock.
Time never tells when your pendulum stops
Breathing to be leaving only a breath behind.
Leave behind a legacy, holding onto what's mine.
Only to realize that nothing is mine
Just a ticket to the gate passed living lines.

Life slips through fingers like a blur,
Conversations twist into a slur,
But the rain is sweet around me
When I leave, let everything be as it were,
It's beautiful by mistake,
It's beautiful with magnificent purpose.
Let it exist and keep greed away.

Don't tell the kids not to play
I know more accidents happen that way
But so do most of the memories.
We create rules to stay safe,
We create rules for kids to break,
Somewhere in that a friendship for them to make.
And if we all make it home
We can laugh it off along the way.
We can laugh it off along the way.

It seems like the largest homes
Have the most broken family.
Look at all the stuff, it can't fill the hole,
You are still alone, while I get a loan,
You can't get along, I am barely standing.
Afraid, they buy up safes and guns,
Afraid, while the children get bored and high off drugs.
They do it to escape their minds,
They buy designer drugs to pass the time.
Then once all the fun is done,
They go back to an empty mansion.
Return to responsibilities then remember,
They don't have them.

I represent a lower middle class,
People ask me what is that,
They don't understand.
Let me explain like this,
I don't qualify for assistance, I don't collect stamps,
I can't afford a *** to **** in,
I've got debt from the world just spinning.
I'm not upset, I keep my head to stay modest.
But I still feel the shackles of life, if I'm being honest.

Every person shakes your hand and smiles,
With a knife to hold, you sell your soul.
The tiny printed stamp goes on for miles.
They only let you get ahead once you break the bread,
That holds your morals and convictions,
Then turn and give the same hand shake,
To the next man who will listen.

I built a house of cards as a child
And smiled looking over the structure,
The perfection of each placed piece
And the integrity it held standing tall.
Then at the bottom I pulled
The ace of spades from where it stood,
Suddenly the whole building did fall.
In awe, I looked and sat,
The entirety had now gone flat.

I see a lot of hate these days,
I see a lot of everything.
Racism still running rampant,
****** preference hate still lingering,
A bunch of lies broadcast on TV,
People concerned I'm always smiling.
Does it bother you that seeing a smile bothers you
It's bothers me, it doesn't bother you
Don't bother understand I'm just rambling
But in all honesty, you should be bothered all the same
This spinning planet makes less sense to me all the time.

We hand the kids the Internet in tiny little screens
Don't bother to watch over, in a jungle of unclean
Common core, you do the simple math
Raise up a generation of sociopaths
Of privileged poor who believe they deserve more
And fight for rich in desert war
With no clue what they are fighting for
Take small amounts of radicals
And make casual assumptions of an entire race
This is the narrow-mindedness  we still face
If you don't see my side, that's fine.
This spinning planet makes less sense to me all the time.

I swear I'm not bitter, I'm just scared with what I see
Divorce became so common
Teens actually tried for pregnancy
People became photos posted socially
I'm glad, on my street, there are no street lights
The stars, the sky look so pretty
No one looks up there anymore and that's a pity.
If you don't see how small you are
You don't see how big an impact you can be
Just a few beliefs, in a mind of mine
This spinning planet makes less sense all the time.

Do you know where the spirits sleep?
Just past the farthest trees you see
Down a withered path where willows weep
The tangles of trees hide the magic unseen
To eyes unwilling to learn new roads.
Just follow the trickles leading to a stream,
Letting your soul simply flow.

Swing from the vines in the rhythm your bones have felt,
But don't stray or they may also hang yourself
Be a person out here, be a being
Be whatever you'd like.
The pressures of city, melt with no others in sight.
Where the wind still whistles
And each star shines and gleams
Nothing is as it is but everything is as it seems.
It's perfectly perfect, the natural world, no one sees.

I'd rather dance like fool, than not dance at all
Kids learn not to jump for fear of a fall
But what is the pain of falling when you've felt nothing at all?
Do you know where the spirits sleep?
Take a walk, a run, or a skip
I promise if you do, you'll find them really quick.

Don't my words look good on paper,
Dripping from the warmth of conviction
Trailing honestly leading you along.
Spreading like ink blots doctors use
To show how sinisterly I am wrong.
Keep growing, smearing onto your hands
At long last, you look back at a page
Coming to see, it's only ink.
The story disappears within
Like a cave, not visible how far it goes,
How far it goes and how deep you're in.

If it's all the same, in darkness,
No one notices how far they drop.
A year can pass in seconds
Losing a second of eternity without the clocks.
Catching yourself from spinning, dizzy,
When the ride abruptly stops.
You can never get back on,
The entrance looks all boarded up,
The lights all shut off.

But don't I look good on paper,
Illegible scrawling no one read.
Before the ink took over,
They'll wonder what it said.

We hide in the saddest places
Because no one looks there,
Under the stones that have been left alone
Never to be unturned, I've learned
Its better to never open the bottle
They'd rather I wallow in waste
Because that makes me convenient, that's fair.
I'm the substitute even in the stories I write
So why would any other have any other sight?
Isnt that right, Claire?

Its easy to dance like no one is watching
When you know no one is watching.
Where's the auction I turn back on my body
The auctioneer is stuck, no one's wanting
The ghosts populate my cranium space,
The poltergeists are not done haunting
I want to taste real emotion instead of taunting,
I'm just a host for a past still walking.

They ask for real answers but my written tongue
Can spread darkness like cancer,
Can give hope to the hopeless
But some don't know what hope is
Can give hope to the hopeless
But maybe you noticed, now I'm the hopeless

I wonder what it's like to not "good morning"
Passing out without a "good night"
Some days the world will feel more lonely
Some days your head won't be on right.
The sun may hide behind those clouds,
The stars may not shine so bright.
You just need to keep going,
Everything will be alright. In time.

The **** clock is stuck on the seventeenth hour
A cold shower to wake up your mind
Eating ninety-eight packets of oatmeal,
It's the only breakfast I could find.
Nothing feels real without "good morning"
Tell me how to start this day
Stuck in my head so here I lay.

I know what it's like without "good morning"
I bet a lot can say the same
Put on my clothes to slave away,
I'm trying to keep my world all right
Until I put my head down
Passing out without "good night"

A woman walks through a store with a couple of kids,
She doesn't know yet  but she only has a week to live,
While a man at the register is getting ****** because he can't
Buy case of energy drinks using food stamps
While right outside the store, an old lady is being mugged
The crook runs right past a couple who just fell in love.
Meanwhile across the street a biker jumped over a ramp
A bus honks at him carrying a camp of kids
Who are all starry-eyed and don't even know what it's like to live

It's funny, the moment I'm sitting in
Stopped the world for the moment
To let all these little things sink in
Its funny, most people aren't watching our fall
If this whole place disappeared,
I fear no one would notice at all.

A kid brought a gun to school the other day,
While one played hookey, all his friends blasted away
Now he has guilt just for lying and surviving
showing that the worst thing isn't always dying.
Most people are more scarred of public speaking than dying
I'd rather stand on a podium inspiring peers
Than have anyone crying wishing I was here
It's funny how it all seems simple when I'm looking in the rear

It's funny, the moment I'm sitting in
Stopped the world for the moment
To let all these little things sink in
Its funny, most people aren't watching our fall
If this whole place disappeared,
I fear no one would notice at all.

Do you ever question who you'd be if you weren't you
And your past was someone else's and never knew what you knew
Would you still have the same beliefs, probably not
Currently they seem undeniable but they sold and you bought
If you lived across the world it might mean nothing at all
But no one is paying attention, no one's watching us fall

Are you reading this?
Is it loud enough to reach you there?
What time is it? It's getting pretty dark here.
The stars are bright but there's clouds tonight,
Small talk all about the weather,
Only lacking something better to say.
There's so much more to say.

Keep it simple, good morning.
Take a picture of all the surroundings
Show me your day, show me your world,
The things that make you tick,
The ones nobody sees but secretly,
They really mean everything.
The stuff that makes you smile without trying,
The dreams you're on while I'm writing,
Show me that world.

Tell me all the things you think,
The thoughts you hold back
because someone might laugh.
Someone might cut you off
While you're sinking your soul into a thought.
I won't interrupt, tell me all of it, I insist.
I wonder, if you're reading this.

I wanted to paint my soul
So I dunked both my arms into blue and green
And threw them onto the canvas
As the liquid splattered, light gathered
Out of the sheet and danced the room,
Only giving me its sight then zoomed
Back into the place it had come.
Before it dried, I spread my hand across,
Letting the bright colors smear and run.

I drew pencil lines around the fine nothingness
But they insisted to create, instead, a bridge
From one side to the other, there I laid,
Swearing I could feel wind, in the light,
The middle of the bridge swayed
Over the sea of blue and meeting in green
Magically moving at that in between.

Cutting my hand, not too deep,
I let myself drip and the liquid creeped
Into the work that was myself,
Disappearing among the colors I felt.
This was me, a soul, puncturing the middle,
Making myself whole.

I've got a pocket full of tomorrows
In a pair of jeans with a rip
They only trickle out so when asked for time to borrow
I don't mind stopping even a little bit.
They tell me the stress of a job
Is worth a barely liveable wage
Something tells me I'm being robbed
Too tired to even sit and write a page.
Talking to myself as a child about the real
He says I shouldn't shake a hand on such a raw deal.

The same kid dreaming of a Tall-tale Town,
With a train blowing up cotton candy clouds,
I bet most people don't remember that now
Writing in physics class about a nonphysical town.
Now I write to slow time to think myself whole,
Time just being the distance over the speed
Sitting light years away, letting my story unfold
Until I drag myself back down to take the lead.
The stories may appear to some eyes with less fantasy
But I keep trying to write lines that defy gravity

There's a world out there flowing through the moon and sun
I won't stop dreaming until that world is done

Ten thousand hours to master a skill,
Here's ten thousand words on how i feel
Take them at face value,
My mind is trying to make my heart real.
America told me to hold onto that belief,
In a country free to have a dream.
I've got ten thousand words now,
This is all I ever wanted to be.
Pointing at myself in the mirror saying
Don't you lose that steam.

I'm creating my own space,
I've waited so long to have a taste
And i would fight to the ****** end
Anyone looking to take it away.
So while you walk through the stores
I keep tapping these keys away
Hoping one day the shelves will say my name.

Everyone loves a love poem,
But they crave to read of heartache
Everyone wants to read of perfection
Yet would rather read what they can relate.
Seeing words of confidence on a screen
Looking at self, wondering what they mean.
While I stay up writing my dreams,
I'm wishing I could write about sleep.
Feeling like I can have everything now,
Knowing I'm just stuck in wait.

Everyone loves to preach peace,
Deep down brewing violence
We all just want to get high
So we don't feel so low
Listening to the loudest sounds
Always seems like I'm hearing silence
Speaking words that don't show
Any action in mind.
Searching for passion in life,
Tell me if it's something I can find
Racking my brain with stress
To find a way to unwind.

We can't accept love for being pure
When all we feel is unworthy
Living life seems just pain endured
Until our bodies are done working

The one where the car is underwater,
And the pressure starts to creek
While the water seeps through cracks,
The cold pooling at your feet
The seat belt is stuck and you pull with might
The air starts feeling thinner, lungs are tight
You break free, as your strength comes back,
The windows each begin to crack.
Remember,

Swim up, it just isn't your time.
Swim up, while there is still light.
Swim up, don't stop.

The one with six chambers
Five cold and one burning hot
Spun with a flick then a click
Tell me how much danger can drop
At the hit of a hammer all other sound stops
The lottery doesn't play nice, son
Sometimes he bangs out like a gun.

Swim up, it just isn't your time
Swim up, don't stop

I carry a house on my shoulders,
Some bills have been bogging my mind,
I've had a tub overflowing for some time
With a smile and bags full of boulders under my eyes
I can't complain, sir, I'm doing fine.
Not fine in the sense, that I'm doing bad
Yet, don't want the atmosphere to be tense
But fine like life is a struggle, no clouds are in my sky
Unless it's raining, in which case we dance.

See, people don't realize you only get one shot
To ***** up your life with every atom you've got
And listen to many past generations
Then continue to make the mistakes you've been making,
I'm not being sarcastic, it's wonderful.
Seriously, I can't think of a better time to live
Sadly, people give all they can give
To a digital internet, no disrespect.
But stop posting and really live, disconnect.
Stop taking pictures and videos to show others
Who cares if acquaintances  like or love it?
It's your life, do you love it?

I've heard from strangers for years say, go get published,
So I ask if they'd buy a copy, they say no
It's not their thing and they feel out of place
Then tell me why your advice was to put my money to waste?
Even fans wouldn't offer me a spot
On their shelf or their wall, so just leave me here
You don't need to encourage me at all.
I'll write until my fingers turn to nubs
I've been ***** all my life, no matter how hard I scrub.

The closer you get to the truth,
The more lost you will become.
Search for answers, there's a chance your
Entity within yourself will be undone.
Following this rope where it may go
Learning later it led to a noose.
Still follow those animalistic instincts
Until you're in too deep,
Wondering what that path would show.

Pay attention as you walk this way,
The sunflowers all turn their flowerheads.
Don't dismiss them, instead listen,
heliotropism shows you've gone astray.
Like oysters following a carpenter until dead
To a Walrus they had been fed.
Look around, the trees all look the same
Look around, walking in circles again.

Ensnared in what you had to know
Each limb entangled, being pulled
Every secret revealed in a flash.
Curiosity took a knife to ****** the cat
But satisfaction brought him back,
Keep walking until you find your home.

Do you know how the shadows dance?
They dance just like humans do.
In the softest light, on the darkest night
There's a chance you may see them too.
With a bow of a head and an outstretched hand
They stand as close to me as you.
She pauses on sight then she accepts
Lost in a gaze, she knew.

Spinning as quick as the beat would allow
Leaping without ever leaving the ground
In a twilight, feet never making a sound.
Familiar only when no one else was around.
They stop.

As darkness creeps, he keeps her figure
From bowing out with his own
As the sun did flicker,
They disappeared into the unknown.

I wrote a lot today it seems
In just my mind through working mayhem
Without a pause to jot the thoughts i thought
I didn't have a pad to pen,
so when I had a chance to write them, sadly, I forgot.
Most days, I'd say, I have a lot on my chest
If I don't wash them off, they slowly infect
The inner rind of my brain, I rewind and replay
But when Ryan writes it out, no dismay just joy
Making me not such a dull boy, leave the work
And go play.
That's the opposite of Jack, I'd say.

They say not to judge a book by its cover,
Others say trust instincts overall
Yet I say that instincts are synonymous to covers
Either way I'll shake your hand and say "Good day" .
But speaking of covers i cut the front page of books
And glued one to each the other in order to make all agree,
Then I went with my gut and started to read.
Don't bother making sense and forget being tense
For in the future perfect, i will have still been correct.

I'd often agree to take time to see through eyes
Other than my own,
Imagine the times so concentrated, now as an adult grown.
Still I lose, in the most humble defeat,
No sir, I cannot walk a single block in your shoes,
For i have such small feet.

If my words were like a gun
There would be smoke coming off my tongue
I don't think about life during a sunrise,
During a sunset or a star showered night.
I think about life eating a plate of nachos,
Drinking too much coffee with my wife.
I know in a big picture, I don't make the portrait
But when they torch these walls, I'll help restore them.
I can keep calm with a poker face like you,
But truth is, I'd rather be a joker getting wild with the twos.
I'm one of the few honest liars left
And we don't rattle. We don't rattle.

It's an odd feeling knowing the words,
That keep me up at night,
Won't matter once they're out, still unheard
Only said as the emotion lingering in my head.
I lie in bed putting my thoughts to rest
Sliding my finger to turn the page
Back to the real world behind the stage
Of a notepad and metophorical pen
Because a digital thought looks neat,
If only you saw the backspacing eraser
Scribbling out all my waste you'll never meet.
But we don't rattle. We don't rattle.

This is a story, they say I'm a character.
Can you tell me the ending, I'm asking
Because I don't know where I'm going,
Are we just simply showing an adventure?
One man's struggle left unmentioned,
Always seen blurry due to the world's hurry.

Is this it? Existing in the subtitles,
I thought I was surviving to perform accolades.
Instead, I feel mostly in the way
While they perform accolades.
I don't want to pass away but,
Why did you keep me here?
Just for everyone to pass my way?
I was built for greatness, I know it.
I feel it like you feel the wind blowing.
If I'm a character, show me what path to take!
No? It's three a.m. I lay awake,
Hoping for anything to say.

This is a story, anyone have an ear for lending?
I know the truth but, I won't ruin the ending.

She washes over me like the tide,
The water feels cool on my skin
The salt burns from within.
I'm lost in the sands of time,
As the world goes rushing by
I can exist for a minute here
If I just close my eyes.

She crashes down like waves
Pulls my hands and sways
Watching as that world fades.
Does she see this place from miles away
Is it just a dream we create
Or is it life for another day?
Tell me what you see in me.

As the night falls, waters recede
As the sun sets at the sea,
So did the day where everything. Felt right.
A little piece remains there, I believe

Mania, mania. Let's talk about it.
My gears sputter clear into hyperdrive
I arrive quick at conclusion, no solution
Its amusing, legs shaking, eyes waving,
Fingers quaking, hair pulled.
I'm done waiting!
Give me a task, give me a meaning
Keep moving, keep cleaning
Stop the thoughts, they're hating.

Oh you see? You understand?
I'm not OCD, I don't need to repeat my words.
Repeat my words back to me
I am sometimes stuck in panic,
Running frantic, couldn't plan it,
I just ran my skull into the ground
Then pounded my fists down, every knuckle.
****** knuckles dripping dew like honeysuckle.
Sweep my legs and pray I buckle.


Deliberately dealing with dysfunction
Indebted to the devil's doing double damage
Leaving my body famished, somehow I manage
Like Scott's tots on a college block
Took a long shot and a short drop
Speaking through a door triple locked
Making my mind muffled, it's a struggle.
Put your ear to the door, you're sure to hear me whisper:
"Make it stop"
Mania, let's talk about it.

I'm not a poet, not an artist.
I can't say I've broken walls.
You won't read me, won't like me.
I won't be a quote you end up reciting
In ten years to friends in a quip
As if I could be slipped into normal conversation
As if my fame has any relation to my body's
Descent into the ground, I will still stay unknown.
Except to notebooks where dust has grown
Accustomed  to being undisturbed.
You won't read me.

I've been driving down the same streets
Been tapping my foot to the same beat
I don't know, friend, maybe it's just me but,
Every path that I lead,
Every place I go and then leave,
It all feels the same, the players don't change.
Doesn't it seem strange?
They've been mapping out my path since first grade.
They had a plan for me before I even played.
No?

I've been driving down the streets I paved,
Take a look at my world, friend,
Everything you see, I made.
I don't not believe in some force of fate
But nothing ever changed for people
Stuck living in a wait.
While the players never seem to change,
Look deep inside my eyes, I've changed.
While they give reasons in comfort to stay,
I'm ready for a new game to play.

If you neglect all the perspective,
You neglect your potential.
Staring down at my tip-less pencil
"You're broken and useless"
Sharpen your image and mind
And let's do this.
Look into the looking glass, take a breath,
Looking back at a beautiful mess.

Tomorrow is an average day to most people,
tomorrow is the last day for a few people,
tomorrow is the first day for a few people.
Isn't that amazing.

Too Much Caffeine in the Poetry

My brain feels spun,
The other kids are having fun.
I'm not sure what direction I'm on.
Should I be playing, slaying, laying down
I don't let the ground hold me up.
I sip apple juice from a Lego cup
Then let my thoughts erupt.
Blow off my mind, it's dusty
But I'll be a quick spitter like Rusty
The pinch hitter who lost the game
Still dancing all the same.
Oh and you just lost the game.

I'm sorry, I'm not sorry.
The engines are not starting,
The cylinders should be firing
Though now expiring, into nothing.
It's not snow, it's just a dusting.
I have a two, a five, a seven, jack and queen,
In other words, I am absolutely bluffing.
The suit does not match the shoes that
I wore to score a date too late.
Miss Cinderella it's half past eight
And those glass shoes are positively fake.

Today I wrote nothing,
Mistrusted my hand to stand on it's own
But Mr. Right, I was wrong.
You need to leave the page alone.
Today, I drank a drink that made me think
I'd never stop the twitching hop
My mind had surely bled
And left this mess before I went to bed.

I'm sick of being the good guy,
With intentions that you may like.
I'm tired of being supportive,
Because sometimes you really aren't right.
I'm afraid if I open the cage,
The lid won't close quite as tight.
If I let this world see my rage,
They will see me in a different light.

I've wrote about my father before,
It's been a war that I've fought since ten
But I was sick of seeing a devil play victim,
So I wrote him one last letter
And deleted him out of my life again.
I can curse in times when I'm ******,
It's real ******* nice to be free. I promise,
the next person who thinks I'm looking for privilege,
When I talk of my allergies.
Will get uppercut so many times they will only look up to see,
I'm a survivor, not a victim
So kindly shove off if you'd please.

People love to be supportive,
They read one thing I wrote,
You should get published,
All these people would love it,
Would you buy a copy? Well, no.
But imagine who would!
You might make fortune and fame.
That's funny, I will save my money,
But I love the dreamy game
I should tell, I know who would buy it,
Even if I don't publish, my mother still loves me the same.

I'm eating microwaved pizza with only oven directions
Cracking open a bottle of whatever is in the clearance section
Thinking over my life decisions and selections
Feeling like they spun me until I lost sight of direction
And please don't take me wrong, I don't speak with aggression.
I speak like an old man, passing advice to a child
Playing this life like a movie with a half-smile
It ain't all bad but, the bad has a longer echo
Giving you time to dissect those tragedies to death
Don't waste your breath on what can't be changed
Simply because, it can't be changed.

Remember, as you read my heart, that I'm the generation
With an entitled mind, with every door open, yet they're all empty inside.
they don't listen, no one listens, just continue to position us as victims.
I'm not a victim I just want a chance.
The same one you got, with the same promises you sought
My social security already has a plot in a grave I'll never see
So if you can explain what entitlements will I ever see?
I don't even own these clothes, my home, my life
They'll tax my mind if I don't write clear into the afterlife.

If I protest in a peaceful manner, I'm a coward
If I come violent, I'm a threat
If I keep my mouth shut they pretend I don't exist
So tell me how to exist by your terms?
What's acceptably respectable, you choose
because it seems I've learned, no matter what I lose.

You don't need a tall tower
With staircases twisting  for miles
Or cameras watching at every hour
Making sure you stay idle
To lock someone off and away,
Give all the fake freedom
Keeping them closely at bay
Hand them beautiful desires
With no emotion behind them,
Learning nothing gold can stay.

Hand off lots of paints and pens
Let them fall in love with an art
Then call it waste restricting passion.
Build them up to be flawless,
Put later to a mirror, showing hardness
In their weight, their love, their soul.
Treated like puzzles stealing just a piece
So they may never feel whole.

You don't need a cage to hold a prisoner
Not a single iron bar is needed
Just strip them of their worth
Until they sit stoic and defeated.

I woke up from a drugged sleep,
Went to work feeling like I had no feet
I speak my mind when my mind goes numb
There's no candy - coating when the sugar runs.
It's unfortunate when benedryl turns me to a zombie shell
But, contrary to my spoken thoughts,
I tend to write pretty well.
So I set my sails on paper trails leading into ink infested wells
Not literally though, I bought a pack of 20 pens on sale.
Caligrapher? I could never be. My mind spits too vapidly.
The metal tips snap back at me, leaving splatters on the tapestry.

I take a bath, I take a bath with a cup of tea
And stupid show on TV, stifling my own laughing
My wife is in the room connected and she's trying to sleep.
I wake her up occasionally to tell her an obsurd thought,
Most of those nights I'm up past three.
I swear she compliments my crazy mind quite perfectly.
She'll read this babble I wrote and tell me I'm silly.
And do you know why? Because I'm silly.

I wouldn't know what to do with a lot money,
I don't want fancy cars or designer meds.
But I'd love a glass of orange juice with some pulp, instead.
I'm not a picky person, but there are a couple things I hate,
Like asking for fresh - squeezed and getting concentrate.

Tell them a story kid,
Show them a world brand new
Or a looking glass unseen
Show them the world as you see it
Stuck in the middle of life
Like the lie you believe in.
I've seen my spirit drop my body
Then pull back yelling "I'm not leaving"
People want your blood like vampires
And they can have it when I retire
Until that day, I'll battle these demons.

Don't get lost in a good book
Or some poem by a written no one
Go outside and look at the clouds
see what others still haven't found
Lay down, like a child, right on the ground
And count the cars as they pass
Not with your eyes, just wait for the sound
You know, I used to, how about you?

I bet there's an old shop you remember
All remodeled and renewed,
If you could have it back, what would you do?
Lost some friends and family?
I've lost those too, trade it all away
For an hour or two, catch up for a minute
To tell them about life, where you've gotten in it.
And in times your memory of them fades
I'm certain they feel the same way.

Tell them a story kid
Show them a world brand new
Or a looking glass unseen
Show them the world as you see it

I have this bass in my skull
So now all my thoughts are pounding
But come out with an emotion that's dull
They want me to speak a little more serious
I laugh off the world's issues because if not I'd be furious
Everybody believing everything they read
Knowing no one's really reading because very few believe in me
Rather splatter the internet with a rumor or scheme
Then trust that they're soaking your carrots in chlorine
I mean,  what if you took the time to research and truly decide?
I'm not a god or a prophet, sir, I'm just along for the ride
As you drive into the unknown,  you follow that front wheel
But what if your bike has a mind of its own?

They've got us distracted off on a less than beaten path
With another sweep to knock you off your feet
Left to be eaten by Chuckle Teeth.
They smell fresh meat quicker than Jaws
Then you're stuck in a loop in some fictitious claws.
"But look at the validity and all of these facts"
If you found it that easy, they planted the evidence for just that
And nobody's listening just fighting their case
While I stand on the sideline and awkwardly pace

When I was a kid
And the family walls were falling
I remember thinking it would all be okay
If I could just learn to wall kick
Stick the landing, while the world was crumbling,
I look for applause for still standing
But the truth is they don't see you for standing strong
Just enjoy the scene when that strength is gone
Disgree, I'm asking you to prove me wrong.

Show me the story of your high school friend who made it
Not the hundred that stayed in the mould and faded
Show me the car crash that was evaded,
The hero, who's past wasn't completely exploited,
The victim that didn't end up on that stage desserted,
But no, that human nature is too perverted.
Forget the man saved, here's more on the murderer
News casters will give you the gritty details like sheep herders

Maybe your world isn't simple to fix,
Just keep working, this life has no tricks
At the end of the day, you know what makes you tick
But before the world came crashing
I learned to wall kick
So while the struggle is as real
As the wheel you steer,
keep screaming until the deaf even hear

We walked out into the quiet night,
Down the streets we knew
Following the dim streetlights
Seeing the shadows cast that grew.
Turning corners to a darkened place
Turn back, as your heart begins to race?
No, we have to walk straight through.

We walked onto a road of dirt,
Where the trees hung at each side
Feeling the trail beneath our feet
The ground worked from each car that had passed by.
It was calm, only nature making noise
Only thoughts to keep us company
Where nothing need be said
We walked without society talking in our heads.

We walked to the edge of the earth that night,
Looking out into the outer space
How small we seemed to it all
A couple people lost in hate and waste.
But if we could change something,
As small as the world made it seem,
To someone it may mean everything

We all wander, don't bother.
I don't need direction, don't need the answer.
Stop staring with question, I'm not a lesson.
I go through life without a plan B
Yet if you notice my limbs,
You may not know how I'm standing.
Jumping from feats like a legless cat,
I just pray that I'm landing.
If this map doesn't work out,
Then I'm just another dream they were right to doubt.

Ignore me, come on, abuse me.
My body is ready for another internal bruising.
You want to conjure memories
I'll blast off with super Saiyan energy
Push me with every bone and muscle,
I'm a poet, I don't need to go and tussle
I'll pound you down with leaded ground
You won't see the shots I rapidly land
Just know my power level is over nine thousand.

I've got scars I forgot existed,
The kind people hear in defensive laugh.
The kind if given a similar treatment, deployed.
I'll line up every shot for you, destroyed
Don't apologise, I've swatted bigger webs of lies.
I never hold a grudge and never have tried
But I'd rather see you crucified.

There was lightning inside me tonight,
Burning bright in electrical static.
There was thunder erupting in decibels
From my finger tips booming in havoc.
Flashing instances of light too quick to tell
If my thoughts were striking to fall
Then sitting quiet, these words appeared
In an eerie calm.

There was wind seeping out from my lips
Blowing life into paper once lifeless,
The corners would rise and drift
Like the tide would slip under a boat,
Steady she goes and keeping afloat.
As my breaths did flow evenly paced,
The salty air blew through this place
Leaving these words in haste.

There was rain dropping from my eyes
Rolling down my cheeks, dripping onto lines.
They say things may soon come clear
But my cloudy head is pretty grey, I fear.
As the tears hit and water spread,
They left a poem once they dried
As I went off to bed.

I wonder if they have a plan for me,
I bet they thought I'd make big change
Instead of spending my time dancing in the rain.
They probably had a career in mind
With a golden etched name plate
Let me write their map and see
If I have the steps straight.

Go to school and get good grades
To pay a lot to school some more
To jump out into a world they didn't prepare me for.
Nobody wants my degree, the market's flooding.
It's not about what I know, who I know is no one.
Remember you're doing this for the money,
You're doing this for the security
And they're ready to own you for it.

It's like seeing a sign that says chips for shots
I'd rather hold my pride than give in to a drop
I'd help break the bar for that kind of dealing
It just shows how quick heroes turn to villains
Depending the eyes you see through
In the distance of all of that chaos
There's a voice in the back of my head yelling,
"Just be you"

Welcome to America,
Where we don't judge you by the color of your skin
But maybe you shouldn't say it
If you have to defend saying you have a black friend.

Welcome to America,
Where every election talks about illegal votes
from a bunch of illegal hosts
From the side you hadn't chose
Then throw your opinion down legal throats.

Welcome to America
Where the news said socialized medicine
Was just another word communism
And you believed them.
Another man got a six figure bill for cancer in his throat
Walking out alive with his house foreclosed.
No money for food, wondering streets unfed.
He's alive but he wishes he was dead.

Welcome to America
Where we talk about gun control
They think that a ban is the goal
But maybe we should look more into who gets sold
And maintain a license to keep
Knowledge is power, totting guns but weak.

Welcome to America
Where the internet is your MD
Don't trust the man who got a degree
Who went to school and ruled your move
But you just Googled it so it must be true

Welcome to America
Where I have pride in this land
But everyone is out of line
For reasons they don't understand
Being ignorant doesn't justify your mind
And maybe even I am out of line
But I'm listening to comprehend

We don't speak the same language,
Cultured different, made out to be strangers.
I'm a human, you're human. Let's change this
Perception of devalued nature.
My race doesn't determine my worth,
I denounce every advantage they gave my birth.
Take my heart at the value of my whole,
Tell me, what color is soul?

Forget our looks, judging any as a felon,
You think it's a crime to have melanin?
Every parent wants their child to make it home
If they aren't up to trouble, leave the kid alone.
Offer money to women to devalue their ***,
That's a person you treat only as flesh.
Don't dare make any feel less than whole,
Tell me, what color is soul?

If your religion is speaking for peace,
Your beliefs are positioned with me.
Quiet, listen and I swear you would see
Your enemy is not what you believe.
All any want is decency,
To be spoken with respectfully,
Still we strike others down so low.
Tell me. What color is soul?