Is this because I hurt you
so Deeply?

I’m sorry
I truly am Sorry

Lay it all on me
I’ll listen
Just listen

I DO care!

Dear, my Deer in the headlights
startled by this deep desire…
Did my fire frighten you away
into thick forests where you stay
& hide your gentle light from my sight?

I am no mountain cougar
crouching in your tracks to pounce
& wreck your regal gait.

I am the tracks you left behind.
I am the flower in the wood.
I am the cloud drifting above.
I am the falling drops of rain,
tears shed for your lost love.
I am the babbling brook beckoning you:
Come, rest & drink.

Yet here,
rushing to the brink of a crashing waterfall
fallen over
(over you)
logic buried in the wild churning of this boiling need
I fear:

Do my whirling rapids ***** your prancing hooves?
Would you dash back to a forest cabin
where hunter hangs the most prized rack--
branches of a love once wild & free,
now tethered to a wall, a long forgotten trophy?

Do your startled nerves seek an escape
from the vision of my river rapids
falling, crashing, diving into your bedazzling eyes?
Ought I to withdraw that you might find a calm?
Might you eventually retrace those wary steps
back to my thirsty banks?

I wait
However long it takes,
I pause; I wait.

may your caution find its rest
may your heart soften a nest
may your wandering pause to bless
my waiting hungry days
with the trust of your warm rays.

in my waiting may these roiling surging waters of emotion
subside into a calm,
find stillness, peace
provide a placid place
for rest

flying free at night
twin sharp teeth of white
blood red need, throbbing bleed
ageless faces of eternal longing
blessed bite that brings belonging
fall towards my embrace
melancholy trace trickling from his tongue
naked mouth and I’m undone

Take my all, welcomed fiend
My hate, my love, my in-between
Ravish lips to lips and enter in
Forever hold, embrace of sin
Until I taste of your inferno
Together our memory eternal

City bustle & calm jungle lakes
Ethnic spices and sweet rice cakes
Mystic temple caves, scenic highlands,
Bluff-side hot springs & ape islands
In far-off countries where adventure takes
Still missing the joy your presence creates
This longing heart thirsts in a dry land…
Someday might I wander while holding your hand?

For you, only you, I always will wait
my desired & favorite Travel Companion

Your imperfections fall in all the perfect ways.
My fantasies are memories and memories are fantasies with you.
You set my blood on fire but more—
You’ve been my friend.
My most broken screams have reached your ears.
Because of me, that sharpened boomerang of pain
has gouged your heart at times, and yet…
I know you’ll always care--that’s who you are.
I love being in love with you because
however hopeless the idea of "us" may be,
I still feel more filled with hope when dreaming of you
than when I try to crush this love.

I tried to write a poem
explaining how words fail me
describing how I love you
elaborating on
emotions, desires, passion, appreciation,
the many ways I value all of you.
I tried to artistically create
the essence of ALL you mean to me
I can’t.
You are indescribable
&
I love
all of you
&