How many deaths are we allotted, then?
It depends on the strictness of your definition, one supposes,
For it comes in several degrees of fatality and finality,
And most often in fits and starts,
A process by which we offer up limbs,
Bits of heart and soul,
So that we can forestall some disaster
Even more wretched, more unwelcome,
And even if we walk more slowly, more cautiously
As the repeated runnings of the gauntlet exact their toll,
It may not be the implacable onslaught of age
Which roils our sleep and the periphery of our waking hours
As much as the knowledge
That, unlike our multi-epoched feline brethren,
We may not land on our feet
As the unseen hands blithely toss us
Down one more set of stairs
Which lead to the abyss.

(for ed hart)

well, you fell out of a tree
(beguiling, bewitching, the tips of the branches
long fingers gesturing to you, whispering
listen, kid, i got a secret to tell you.)
and, boom, that was the first time your collarbone got busted up.
maybe later you were just daydreaming, or, more likely,
drunk on some boone’s farm or some girl,
anyway at some point you decided ******* it,
i’m just not falling anymore,
but there was always some cracked pavement
or some tree root hidden by a patch of grass
you missed with the mower,
a million sundry distractions besides,
and one day don’t you just know
that you stuck your hand down  to catch yourself
(of course, you knew how **** stupid that was
the moment you reached earthward,
but the die already cast and all that nonsense)
and, bam, there’s a wrist, snapped like dry kindling.
well, maybe, if your’re lucky enough
and the right angels are looking out for you,
you live long enough to figure out that you’re gonna fall,
and the trick is to hit and roll on your good shoulder.

**** me, **** me, **** me, **** me, **** me, **** me, **** me, **** me, **** me,
**** me, **** me, **** me, **** me, **** me, **** me, **** me, **** me, **** me,
**** me, **** me, **** me, **** me, **** me, **** me, **** me, **** me, **** me,
**** me, **** me, **** me, **** me, **** me, **** me, **** me, **** me, **** me,
**** me, **** me, **** me, **** me, see me, **** me, **** me, **** me, **** me,
**** me, **** me, **** me, **** me, **** me, **** me, **** me, **** me, **** me,
**** me, **** me, **** me, **** me, **** me, **** me, **** me, **** me, **** me,
**** me, **** me, **** me, **** me, **** me, **** me, **** me, **** me, **** me,
**** me, **** me, **** me, **** me, **** me, **** me, **** me, **** me, **** me.

Love me, love me, love me, love me, love me, love me, love me, love me,
Hate me, hate me, hate me, hate me, hate me, hate me, hate me, hate me,
Love me, love me, love me, love me, love me, love me, love me, love me,
Hate me, hate me, hate me, hate me, hate me, hate me, hate me, hate me,
Love me, love me, love me, love me, love me, love me, love me, love me,
Hate me, hate me, hate me, hate me, hate me, hate me, hate me, hate me,
Love me, love me, love me, love me, love me, love me, love me, love me,
Hate me, hate me, hate me, hate me, hate me, hate me, hate me, hate me.

Leave me, leave me, leave me, leave me, leave me, leave me, leave me,
Leave me, need me, leave me, need me, leave me, need me, leave me,
Leave me, leave me, need me, need me, need me, leave me, leave me,
Leave me, need me, need me, need me, need me, need me, leave me,
Leave me, leave me, need me, need me, need me, leave me, leave me,
Leave me, need me, leave me, need me, leave me, need me, leave me,
Leave me, leave me, leave me, leave me, leave me, leave me, leave me.

Believe me, believe me, believe me, believe me, believe me, believe me,
Believe me, it's buried, believe me, believe me, it's buried, believe me,
Believe me, believe me, it's buried, it's buried, believe me, believe me,
Believe me, believe me, it's buried, it's buried, believe me, believe me,
Believe me, it's buried, believe me, believe me, it's buried, believe me,
Believe me, believe me, believe me, believe me, believe me, believe me.

Deceive me, feed me, deceive me, feed me, deceive me, feed me, deceive
Me, believe me, heed me, believe me, heed me, believe me, heed me, feed
Me, feed me, deceive me, feed me, deceive me, feed me, deceive me, feed
Me, believe me, heed me, believe me, heed me, believe me, heed me, feed
Me, feed me, deceive me, feed me, deceive me, feed me, deceive me, feed.

Pleading, appeasing, displeasing, apologising, releasing, pleasing me,
Pleading, appeasing, displeasing, apologising, releasing, pleasing me,
Pleading, appeasing, displeasing, apologising, releasing, pleasing me,
Pleading, appeasing, displeasing, apologising, releasing, pleasing me.

Will you end it quickly, will you end it quickly, will you end it quickly,
will you end it quickly, will you tend to it quick, will you end it quickly,
will you end it quickly, will you end it quickly, will you end it quickly?

Will we ever learn to stop worrying and love the bomb, will we ever
learn to stop worrying and love our carbon?

When the human's over turn out the lights!

Woke up
still drunk,
I feel so sick
listening to Cigarettes After ***
while writing this.

These tears I held back
for a few years have
come and gone and
now I'm hungover.