You said you'd never hurt me
and for a while,
I was okay.
I wasn't good,
I wasn't bad.
I was alive and that's all I needed.

But now,
I'm hurting.
I realize that sometimes repression
isn't always my best skill because
our memory is the cruelest skill God has given us.
I remember the pain,
the feeling of not enough oxygen,
the tightness in my chest,
the bloodshot eyes.
I remember.

I'm scared he'll do that to me too.
I'm scared to be alone,
but I'm scared to drive him away.
I drove you away.

You said you'd never hurt me.
You never said you wouldn't hurt my mind.

Dear lover,
I found you alone on a sidewalk,
on a rainy september day.
I found you reading poetry.
We both liked poetry.
This is probably why I'm writing to you.
When I was a child,
heaven was a dream,
a star, very far from us.
Dear lover,
After that day in the storm,
After I walked with you,
hand in hand
on that sidewalk
and we danced
to the teardrops falling from the sky,
I have realised the beauty of things.
After that day in the rain,
you were happy,
only for a short while.
But every night you'd cry
and call.
'i love you'
'goodbye'
All is grey, have we lost everything.
goodbye rainy day
goodbye new dawn
Dear lover,
beauty dripped from your eyes.
You are sunshine
and rainy day.

water
old-fashioned

food
vintage

oxygen
so last year

now
it's all about hunting waves
on stilettos