Home of the sea
             wavering and beautiful,
    take these tipsy hips home tonight.
            This dress is already ruined.

shoutout to the girls who have become strangers with their first kiss and held lipsticks like paintbrushes on their fingertips. I am one of you now.

I was a child of forever laced with broken promises and memories of every fire you ever lit and forgot to put out.

Here is my mouth and here is every nook and cranny lost in translation straining to make sense.
Here are my hands grasping for the sunset and drawing words in the air when my voice isn't working.
Here are my arteries and here are my veins, unleash me.
Here I stand and here I lay.
On my back,
behind the church,
soiling my dress,
with you.
Scowling at the sky just in case God happened to be glancing down in disapproval.
But, grief is a freight train with no warning signs.
And while I was adopting the feel of the cement you were burying my heart in the cracks of your hands.
Tell me; if it didn't make your heart stop and your memories rage in a split second loop,
was it even a kiss at all?
How I wish to be well acquainted with the river that runs by your grave every time it rains.
Visiting for tea and a glimpse of what used to be when it feels like could never be the same.
It doesn't help that I'm still trying to guess how long the water will take until it's too hot to handle and pushing the limit even then.
Take me back to our little loverance. I'm feeling one shade too tired to be a fighter.
Make me question wearing this color to your funeral and emptying my playlist before you came.
Weird is the new black so best believe I'm feeling downright strange.
Love me anyway.
I've been trying to teach the sun to forgive and the moon to forget.
But, I guess I was mistaken, God only cares on Sundays.
Bring me the easel and grab the pastels.
We're on our own.

Don't look at me like that.
I'll love you just like the sane girls do.
I just can't promise I'll favor your touch over the hailstorm outside.
There's nothing to chase away and I'm busy blaming all of my afflictions on past lives and passing clouds.
Take me back to the  forever children with heavy sighs and empty pockets. Laced with broken promises and tired hands that can't bear to pass judgement on the curves of my tipsy hips. Get drunk off this spirit tonight. Let's explore the sweet spots in the blueprints of our bodies. Let me mark em with honey and let the bees loose. Send kisses to the pilots with green eyes and dead lips.  For if they will never know pain and I will never know hunger quite like I know you. In a perfect world they wouldn't. In a perfect world I would. I just never know what to say and I'm not sure if I trust my mouth to make statements at a time like this. That's what this necklace is for right? And these rain boots? Let it pour. Here is my mouth and here is ever nook and cranny in my hands that signed over their rights to you. It's a buzz baby. Drown me until I remember my lungs love me anyway and the cathedral steps would miss me.
Kiss me like I never had a reason to run.

tales from the neglected side of your sunny side ups and reminders of how it feels to be down. how it felt when you used to check the bottoms of your shoes for molasses in the morning thinking that there had to be something there slowing you down as you trudged into the room. Mama told you to pick up your feet you told her to shut the **** up and listen to the signs as you listened to your heartbeat with the old stethoscope you found in the basement. Gods favorite little tune on repeat as you recalled all the reasons you would say goodbye if you could. Keeping rhythm with the idea that you're alive when you maybe shouldn't be and that in some sick way you would switch everything off just to get this ******* song out of your head. But, silence is maddening at this time of night and deep down you know you just wish you could remember what it was like to be sunny side up again.