I went on a walk today and as I looked to and fro between the breezy tree's and the sun shining against my pale white skin-- I realized you are not even thinking about me.

On this almost summer day, I walked for a little bit.
I let the air soak into my skin, I let the sun brighten my hair, and I let the weather affect me in the best way. I decided to let the earth have it's way with me for once.

I took a step into the gate where the pool laid silently and alone in my apartment complex. I slipped off those sandals I knew you hated when I wore them, and I smiled. I slipped off that ugly kimono I knew you hated and I laughed.

Because for that moment... that single second of me stepping into the cool water on that hot almost summer day... I didn't give you a second thought.  I didn't care about the things you hated about me. I didn't care about the things you loved about me.

I took a sip of the sparkling red wine I bought a few days ago, I sat in the pool, hair  up in a messy bun, water and sun  rejuvenating my body and soul in a way that you will never understand.

I sat there... and I thought... this is it.
This is how it feels to let negativity flow out of you and let love for yourself slowly in.

A pale pink splashes across the sky. The water laps against the dock, pushing it back and forth, a soothing rhythm.  The lake reflects the sky, a cloudy mess. Sitting with my ankles in the water, I listened to you talk. The summer, your family, sports, death and rain. We talked for hours on that old dock. The weathered wood cradled our bodies, and the day melted away. Standing on the planks, you looked over the edge. I walked up behind you and wrapped my arms around your waist. With one quick movement, you spun around a pushed me into the lake. I screamed and grabbed your wrist, pulling you in with me. We tumbled into the water together. When I surfaced, I saw you swimming towards me. Your hair was a mess, and your t-shirt was plastered to your fit body. We made eye contact and exploded into laughter. You splashed me with water, and so I sprayed you back. We dragged ourselves back up onto the dock, and huddled in our hoodies. Once again, we dangled our feet in the water and talked about the summer, your family, sports, death and rain. You moved closer to me and laced your hand in mine. An explosion of orange and pink erupted across the sky. I sat with you watching the sunset, thinking that