I carry a pierced umbrella in pouring rain
just to excuse my drenched clothes
just to excuse my drenched eyes

I cant articulate something
without succumbing into pieces
I dream of many people
but I cant recall your voice
My tears are always there
I know nothing about what I am doing

Yet whenever I see something worth living
I find myself bottling them into my pen
that bleeds in silence untouched by any page
I know nothing about rhyming
nothing about writing
I miss you
I am sorry

I have a poem in me
shaped as grief guilt and fury
Sometimes it turns into nostalgia
homes the ruins of your different phases

Sometimes it gets stuck in my throat
like a rotten apple for ages

My screams are always silent
I know nothing about how to deal with this
I find myself forgiving everyone in silence
I dream of being forgiven
I watch you forgetting me
I know nothing about your new favourite song
I miss you
I hope you forgive me

I carry an ache in me
I cant act on something
without an attempt to invent something new out of it
without carving god and sharpening its edges

I run out of things to say
I escape from things just not to get attached
I cant recall your face
my lies are always white

I lied about forgetting your voice
your face still haunts my nights
I know nothing about apologising
I miss you
I hope you never walk past me ever again