To my angel baby, your mumma misses you so much, your brother would have been so excited to meet you. So would have I.
The pain I have can never leave.
The day I found out about you I cried with over joy the excitement I had lasted a short time, my sweet baby I’m so sorry my body failed you.
I think I will ask god for the rest of my life

It’s been 3 months since I’ve lost my baby a miscarriage that silenced my voice. Something I don’t think I will ever understand. Something that has broken me in ways I didn’t know existed.
I have my days where I’m doing ok and I’m happy and days where all I want to do is cry and scream.
No screams comes out I’m just quietly crying but inside I’m a mess my mind is screaming but nothing comes out why oh why did this happen to me. I wanted that baby I would have loved that baby so so much instead I’m here grieving for the rest of my life.
I was having a good day and started crying out of nowhere, you may ask why because the 13th of every month haunts me like an unwanted plastic bag that keeps floating around and never goes away. The 13th of July is when I had my miscarriage while my world was falling apart I had to get up the next day and act like I was fine like I was ok because I still had to be a mother to my child.
But when the worlds still and everything is quiet, I feel lost
I’m wanting to search for you and I keep searching and asking myself why I wasn’t able to carry you just a precious life starting to grow inside me and suddenly you were ripped away. I lost my baby and my baby lost their life. That’s something I’ll never be able to forgive myself for.