i dont know what to think of this one yet. im leanin towards scrapping the whole thing.

i feel so out of place
they forget my name
and why im there.

the thoughts they just race,
they wont stop.
why wont they stop?

there is a point that im trying to get across here. we all feel out of place. maybe with people youve known for multiple years or people youve known for a few seconds. it doesnt change the feeling of being left out and forgotten. im just not sure how to get my emotions across. its hard for me sometimes to fully describe how i feel when im like this, because im autistic. it doesnt stop me. it just frustrates me when my words feel emotionless and like a i cant do anything to make them just feel what i feel! it feels impossible sometimes. i have over 15 drafts on @mysterie. just random ideas. never finished. never edited. just raw and there. im leaning towards scrapping this, unless i get the motivation to try and make this full of emotion and also enough to get my point across.

its okay if i dont find the motivation. again, writing is never perfect. i dont have to finish writing this and fix it up. though it would help me to regulate and sort my head out a bit, i dont have to. its okay that writing is messy. its always messy.