Devouring cigar after cigar,
with sad music playing
in the background,
and an old picture of you
glowing through my screen

What have I done so perfectly
to be trapped in
this heavenly lifetime
with your love?

I stare at your picture,
weeping from longing and love,
calling you,
wanting you,
yearning for a miracle that
would gather us
and breathe life
back into our love

What terrifies me is that
you are no longer here…
but I am going to ink your name
into my blood,
to keep you alive within me—
physically and mentally

I want to draw you on my skin
so I will never escape you,
never recover from you
So that each time
my eyes fall upon this tattoo,
etched just above my heart,
I am reminded that I belong to you…
even if you are unaware of it,
or choose to ignore it
or simply do not want it
And I am ready to die
a thousand light-years
for you

But before that,
I am on the verge of completing
all those acts lovers commit
when they defy every boundary
for the sake of love
And after this tattoo,
only one thing will remain—
publishing the book
I am now writing for you,
About Daniel
28/11/2020

I love you now,
and in the afterlife

Your wife,
Nicole