If I exist, then I must be real-
That's how it works,
But it's not how I feel.

I look in the mirror,
Glimpse at the reflection,
But I walk right through her-
We have no connection.

And how many words
Can I say, rambling on,
Before someone realizes
They carry no weight?

Wasting the air
From my tired lungs-
Words are just words
When no action comes.

But action proves nothing
If my words aren’t right;
I could move mountains
And still lose the fight.

I could fill every hole
That’s carved in the ground,
But none of it matters
If I do so without sound.

If I’m not weeping,
Or begging, or screaming,
I make them uneasy-
My silence unredeeming.

I speak so much
It makes my throat hurt.
Sick of myself,
Sick of this work.

And if I begged
This sickness to take me,
She’d just laugh-
And keep on berating.

I know I’ll get up,
I’ll just walk away.
It never lasts long.
It’s only a phase.

But when your villain
Is the girl in the mirror,
It’s hard to ignore
A fear drawn so clear.