Last night
No not right
That night

Behaviour that reminded me
Of the monster that occupies my brain
Every single night
And the one that occupies a room
In a house I'm trapped in

Feelings
Fleeting
Faltering
Hiding

Scared and cowering
In a corner away from you
Behaviour replayed
And driving me slowly insane

Hiding it all
Blinding you to the fall
Feelings only because of him
Things you need to change
But not that night at all

A slow retrieval
Back to thinking
Maybe safe
Maybe okay

Feelings a little closer
To you again
Okay to touch you
Body and soul
Just a little
Just a small nibble
Small taste of you  
To put back into me

But then another

Last night
No not right
That night

Behaviour that reminded me
Of the monster that occupies my brain
Every single night
And the one that occupies a room
In a house I'm trapped in

Feelings
Fleeting
Faltering
Hiding

Scared and cowering
In a corner away from you
Behaviour replayed
And driving me slowly insane

You see the fall
You witness the crash
I tell you to leave
And not come back

Cowering scared cat
My mind and my soul
Turned into a scared animal

Feelings kept at bay
Cannot allow them out
To put me in another situation
That will betray everything
That I've done to not allow people in
Who aren't good for me

Even when the scared animal
Doesn't want to run away
Instead wants to curl up
And stay