Strange, how rare that is

to feel something

so sudden

and still believe it meant everything.

Another night without you

became

another night with you.

Memory playing tricks

like hope does.

I didn’t even want it.

Then came the signs.
Tiny things, quiet things

so loud once you're listening.

I gave in.

And then my insecurities showed up.

They lost me.

They lost you.

There are thoughts

I never dare to share.

Because once spoken,

the magic thins.

And this
this is a secret

between me and the future you.

Your cologne owns my dreams.

Songs follow me.

I still see them
those eyes.
They haunt and hold.

And those **** hands.

Still on me

when you're nowhere near.

Just once,

on your sofa,

I looked at you and

I felt

moments we hadn’t lived yet.

How is that even real?

Were they mine? Ours?

Maybe the heart knows

before the head is ready.


I just remember

looking at a stranger

and somehow

seeing home.

I can’t tell anyone.

The second I say it out loud,

someone else owns it.

And it’s not theirs to hold.

That power.
I redownload apps

just to see if your name
might blink back into my life.

Go on dates

just to prove they’re not you.

But my heart still stops
 at Waterloo Station.

Why is it hardest

to write about something

that felt so easy?

Maybe I blamed that girl from the block,

but it wasn’t her

who wanted to punish you.

Still, maybe

what’s yours

really does find you.

So, if you could just

find me a little faster?