i knew it when
i put my hands out
and she reached back
with cold fingertips
and i giggled
trying to make them warmer

that i just always choose wrong

my heart was racketing hard enough
to untie our trees
in the quiet part of my
imagination

your eyes
haunt me
late at night;
fireflies in the lights
of an abandoned warehouse

our past

our whispers along
my nighttime walk

you paint
my static ceiling

i eye the wonder
in her new eyes
and ask the universe
if i have the strength
to plant the half of my
untangled roots

i ask the universe
if it will finally let me
grow up with someone