I was always a chunky little girl. After the incident at nine years old. I hit puberty, way too soon. That little girl started having curves. The kids at school called me “fat girl.” I hated going clothes shopping. I could already hear my mom say, Ashley, really you sized up again. Stop eating too much, you want to look like those big ladies! She was talking about a show she saw on TV. I wasn’t lucky enough to look like my mom or at least her side of the family. She’s 4’11" and weighs about 109. I was a sixth grader about 5’2" weighing 120. I hated my mom at that time. I don’t want to point fingers, but it was her fault. She had separated from my dad and fell into depression. So, we ate our feelings away. When I see pictures of myself at that age. I say, man, my mom was being a hater, I was just curvy. Well developed. I wore oversized sweaters, which didn’t help my case, made me look ten times bigger. I was that “fat girl”! Till one day, I started calling myself BIG.ASHLEY but I preferred BIG.A. It didn’t stop others from calling me other names. I didn’t care though, well sometimes I did. I wished I had a flat tummy; I wished I looked like the woman in the magazines. My number one bully, the one that helped distort my imagery. I called her mommy; she called me fat girl! She would say it nicely, I think she was just a big meanie.