on nights i feel like i might die
i hear the click of her heels bound in rhinestones
that once glimmered in the sunlight
burning through the kaleidoscope of the stained glass
as wedding bells rung through the cathedral.

the ink is now smudged
from the love letter you left.
roses don’t live forever.
the air is rich with the sour scent
of the dark decay from the flowers

–

RYAN’S iNTERLUDE

YOU MEANT NOTHiNG TO ME.
THE YEARS WE SPENT TOGETHER
ARE NOW TWiSTED iN YOUR NAiVE MiND AS YOUR MiSTAKE.
YOU RUiNED THiS FAMiLY.

MY KiSS GOODNiGHT
NOW STAiNS YOUR SOFT SKiN
YOU KNEW i NEVER WANTED TO BE YOUR FATHER
BUT MAYBE iT’S BECAUSE i DiDN’T WANT TO CALL YOU MY DAUGHTER.

i’D HOPED YOU HEARD THE DEGRADiNG WORDS i WHiSPERED.
i HOPED THAT YOU’D BLAME iT ON YOURSELF
SO iT COULD FiNALLY TAKE THE WEiGHT
OF AN AFFAiR OFF OF MY BACK.

–

i did what you asked and lay the table with the extravagant silverware
our dinners that used to be filled with warm chatter
and lighthearted banter between ‘father’ and ‘daughter’
now start and end with the same sullen eyes of mine
and your head low with heavy breaths.

things will never be the same.
once i slammed the doors,
i never returned the key
the bronze brass that jingles on my chain
knows it won’t ever be used again– because i can’t go back there.

sometimes i think i can run back
to receive solace from the empty rooms
and the echo of the wooden floors
the cold marble counters you pressed me against
late at night when you whispered you loved me.