It's June I'm tired of being brave I don't want to be brave

I'm scared all the time all you know is that
Aerium Marinus it's contagious my thoughts as black as peste
Pry for me ayez pitié de moi
Maria Santa Cruz sauvez moi de moi même
This light will never come in
I want to die I really want to fade into nothingness
I'm storing what I ignore restored when it's less needed
As  they swing like my Grandpa pendulum clock .
Will some day I'd be able to rebecome decisive ?

I  only become woman during night when I muffle all the tears by myself when I don't pray for an entity
Where I beg myself to continue as I sleep an image emerges .....