tw: suicidal ****


Everything's going to ****
I can't remember when I last ate
Trying to figure out why I'm alive
But I'm just grasping at ******* straws
I'm holding on to something
And I don't even know what the **** it is

I keep thinking about how I'd do it
How would I end it?
I finish conversations
Then walk away wondering
How they'd react to the news
If I just... if I just didn't wake up...

I just....
I can't ******* live
I can't ******* die
I can't DO ANYTHING


I just wish I didn't exist




I ABSOLUTELY CANNOT ******* LIVE LIKE THIS AND EVERYTHING IS ONLY GETTING WORSE I'M GETTING ******* DESPERATE AND I MIGHT JUST TRY SOMETHING IF THINGS DON'T CHANGE BUT UNTIL THEN I'M JUST ******* STUCK IN MY MISERY JUST WAITING UNTIL NIGHT TO WATCH MYSELF BLEED OR **** MYSELF OR TAKE SOME EXTRA PILLS TO SLEEP BECAUSE I CAN'T GET OUT OF THIS ANY OTHER WAY AND JUST EXISTING HURTS SO BAD I CAN'T STAND IT AND THERE'S NO ONE TO COMFORT ME BECAUSE THEY'RE ALL BUSY OR FAKE OR LIARS OR MY ******* PARENTS AND REALLY THE ONLY THING THAT BRINGS ME ANY HAPPINESS AT ALL RIGHT NOW IS MY DOG AND HONESTLY IF IT WASN'T FOR HER I MIGHT BE DEAD BY NOW