I’ll Never Be This Age Again

They ooh and ahh
fawn all over me
get excited when I say a word
clap their hands when I take a step
though I look absurd!
Walking like young Frankenstein
Diapers/sippy cups
Whine! Whine! Whine!

I’ll Never Be This Age Again
Santa Clause
The tooth fairy
Fairy tales
Make believe
Soiled clothes
Scraped knees

I’ll Never Be This Age Again
Broken hearts/hurtful words
a face full of pimples
greasy hair
an attitude that’s rude
**** and bras
tampons and pads
drinking and cursing
driving mom mad

I’ll Never Be This Age Again
Jobs and college
Cars and boys
Leaving home
Depression
Anxiety
Suicide watch
Just the cost
of growing up

I’ll Never Be This Age Again
Marriage
A house
And babies
Running around
like crazy

I’ll Never Be This Age Again
Fighting
Divorce
Affairs
Resentment
Anguish
Wrinkles
a thicker middle


I’ll Never Be This Age Again
Forgetfulness
Hot flashes
Sagging *******
and *****
Dreams left unfulfilled
Cancer
Heart disease
Funerals