Daddy

*I remember as a tiny girl
he held me close .
so safe so loving.
it is small wonder
I gave him my young heart.

he called me kitten
no one else
ever called me that.

I remember his sweater
he wore it near Christmas
evey year
even when it was faded.
And had holes in the elbows.

he said it brought Mom back.
But she had left him
and us.
it was my fault he told us.
it was my drinking.

he disarmed us all
with his honesty.
I loved him
even with his demons.

he always made me
feel beautiful.
I still don't know
how he did that.

I said to him
will you marry me
when I am older Daddy.

He smiled
put down his
glass of whiskey.
and said
it would be my pleasure kitten.

But his weaknesses took him
Before I got older.
On his last day on earth
he held me close.
he knew he
was leaving us.

he said almost in a whisper.
Remember kitten
you are a strong young woman.
you have your mother's spirit.
not my weaknesses.

but in the dark
when the world sleeps.
it's you daddy
always you.
only you
knew how to fix me.